The Proviso by Moriah Jovan

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Today's book's similarities to yesterday's book can be summed up rather quickly in four words: Can Be Termed Romance. That's about it. Yet the peripherals of these books are in startling alignment. But I'm not going to spell it out for you. Other than to say I also don't like this cover (albeit for very different reasons):



Unlike Monday's book, this one I have actually read. Moriah sent me an ARC and I promised to read and review it. Although I also told her it might be awhile as I don't generally speed through 700page books. Unless, you know, they're in huge type and being simultaneously read by millions of small children who will ruin it for me if I don't finish it within a week of when they do. But no one has accused this LDS "romance" writer of being the next J.K. Rowling, so I figured I was safe.

So I've been reading the book for a few months now and finished it a little over a week ago. I'm going to start by giving you an overview of the book, but before starting with that start, let me quickly warn you that I am not going to be too worried about being spoiler free. My spoilers will generally be vague in nature, but will let you know What Sort of Thing to expect. You might want to start with the free 200page sample, then return. Just sayin'.

That said, basic structure:

The Proviso, for all the other things you could call it, is three romances. Three cousins take turns falling in love and getting married and, um, too soon for that big of a spoiler. Other things happen too. Right now I'll just say sex, because we can't talk about this book without talking about its sex anyway.

Cousin Giselle falls in love (sex and marriage inclusive) with Bryce. Who is covered in scars.

Cousin Sebastian falls in love (sex and marriage inclusive) with Eilis. Who stops wearing Chanel.

Cousin Knox falls in love (sex and marriage inclusive) with Justice. Who has red hair.

Also there are bullets.

As the author of an it-could-be-called-a-romance-but-that-seems-to-miss-the-point book myself, I'm sympathetic to Moriah's reluctant attempts to pigeonhole her book:

I don’t know how to classify The Proviso. I never did. Drama? Yeah, plenty of that. Family saga? Check. Epic? Uh, most definitely, as it takes place over the course of 5 years. But epic what? I can’t think of a book I could compare it to. Healthy doses of religion and spirituality mixed in with money and explicit sex? What? What’s anybody supposed to do with that? It’s not LDS romance/literature/fiction (defined as anything that could be sold at Deseret Book/Seagull), although I could call it Mormon fiction if a criteria of “Mormon” is that a Mormon wrote it. I call it a romance because I see myself as a romance writer.

It's a complicated book. It's "based" on Hamlet. It shows a heavy Randian influence. It has lots and lots and lots of explicit sex. (She wasn't kidding about that. I don't think I've ever finished a book with so much explicit sex before. And I read Piers Anthony as a teenager.

(Note: Had I hit the first sex scene when I wrote this, I would have rethought my manner of presentation. Especially after this conversation.)

So this book has sex. But the cover should have cued you into that.

Now for a series of disconnected facts about the book that I will comment on as whimsy strikes me.

So the Randian thing. It made me want to scream at times. I'm always leery of anyone--even fictional anyones--who aligns themselves too thoroughly with any one philosophy. But Rand is so much a part of who Giselle and Bryce are that it can't be ignored. They won't let you.

I think Moriah knew how overblown they got, because she balanced the book out with a character who hates Rand and dismisses her as so much hollow frumpf. Phew.

*

Something that struck me as I got, oh, let's say a third of the way into the book, is that most of my irritations with the book came from misunderstanding the characters. From an artistic standpoint, Giselle and Knox (to name only two) are not mere human characters acting out human actions on a human stage. They are Greek Gods. They are the great heroes of yore, transplanted to modern Kansas City. The actions played on this stage are higher and broader and deeper and more more more than anything I myself might ever do. This book doesn't merely borrow plot points from Hamlet. It goes back even further to bring us to a world of Kings Who Are Gods. Once I realized this and then read the book through this perspective, the book worked much better.

The risk, of course, in writing that last paragraph is that you will now dismiss the book as being somehow literarily unworthy. Which would be stupid and make no sense. What, we're going to throw out Edith Hamilton on the same grounds? Be serious. Just because we don't see gods much shouldn't make as book about them less interesting. Think about that logic for a moment....

*

I want to talk about an ethical question for readers which I don't think I had ever considered before reading this book. As a Christian, I am required to forgive all men. Yet I have made a deliberate choice not to forgive Knox. And it was only with difficulty that I was able to forgive Justice for forgiving Knox.

I have decided that, as these are fictional characters, I am under no moral obligation to forgive. These are not living, breathing souls; no matter how well fiction is crafted, it is still an act of creation less than Creation.

After the end of the book proper, Moriah included a set-back-before-the-book-even-started short story, "John 3:16" (available online), the inclusion of which is rather fascinating as it did a couple of things for me, as a reader. Added value, obviously--everybody loves a free bonus. But it also reminds me of how much I hated Knox. And it undercuts all the hard work Moriah had spent in the seemingly impossible task of making me (almost) forgive the bastard, which thing I had sworn never to do. But she spent many many many pages redeeming him and giving him a deus ex machina and then, after the final page, "John 3:16" made me hate him all over again. Fascinating artistic choice, Moriah. You have to tell me why you included it. I have to know.

*

In this book, eyes widen, heads are thrown back in laughter (or in scream), characters gasp for one reason and catch their breath for another, hands move to the face, etc etc etc. The characters seem to have a limited (and shared) repertoire of physical expressions of emotion and thought.

I've been wondering about this. Maybe it's hard to have enough little things to keep these kinetic indicators fresh over 700pages? I don't know.

I've been wondering what I would do with them had I been the book's editor. And I'm not sure. I think, within the realm of "romance", these shortcuts are common. And I don't think they bug other readers like they bug me.

Which reminds me of another stylistic difference between Moriah and myself. In my opinion she spends waaay too long to describing characters and their appearances and their clothes. This is not something I do. As a reader, I'm not likely to remember the way the author describes a character anyway. (Unless they pound it into me repeatedly.) And so I have decided that minimal details are necessary; let the reader create the character in her own image. I will provide vital details but the rest mattereth not and may be entrusted to the reader's imagination.

I am reminded of an interview with Daniel Handler that I can't find now. His publisher had wanted Violet to have some sort of physical description. ANY sort of physical description! He disagreed. He, like I, would rather leave a character a blank slate for the reader to paint herself upon.

The compromise he arrived at was, whenever Violet was ready to invent, she would pull out a ribbon and tie up her hair.

Perfect. Simple. Beautiful.

IMHO

We will agree to disagree on this point.

*

As a reader, I'm not one to read 1000page tomes. I read more for breadth than depth and short books allow me to read more books by more authors.

That said, occasionally reading a biggun such as The Proviso is good for me. The manner of storytelling is necessarily different as are the opportunities available to writer and reader alike.

*

It would be interesting to see how various brands of feminism would take on this book. Take for instance (major spoiler alert here) the uses of pregnancy:

Three main women, Giselle, Eilis, Justice.

Giselle desperately desires to be pregnant but her husband refuses. Eilis becomes pregnant when she is deemed to be the first woman worthy of condomfree sex by her love. Justice, if she has a baby, will fulfill a legal requirement for her husband and bring him great wealth.

I smell a dissertation here, just waiting to be written.

*

Well into what I had thought was a 150page denouement (another major spoiler alert), I was surprised by the book's climax. I mentioned this to Moriah and she said "They let their guard down. So did you." And all I can say to that is Bravo. Well written.

*

I suppose the only other thing I really have to talk about now is the MORMON thing. A healthy percentage of the characters in this book are Mormon to one degree or another. But of the major characters, not one looks anything like someone in a Jack Weyland novel. Besides the copious sex (only some marital) and dripping language (and I don't mean with godliness) and the shooting people in the face, there are no casseroles or home teachers or Pinewood Derbies. This is not a typical look at Mormonism. This is a look at Mormons ranging from the almost lapsed to the never-coming-back. All the good, active Mormons are relatives we only see in passing, on special occasions--holidays and the like.

Yet the book's Mormonism is plain on the face. The issue is summed up well by the first page under the cover:



I'm gonna go out on a limb here and guess this is enough to offend a lot of good Mormons without reading past that first page. And, going further out on this steady and secure limb, I'm going to guess that actually reading the book wouldn't change their minds.

Now, my work has never been labeled erotic, but I, like Moriah, agree that we should not say Mormon artists May or May Not do any such whatsoever. We should watch ourselves and be sure that we judge not. We can certainly judge what we will or will not ingest into our souls, but judging a work's creator is a different problem altogether.

But I'm getting offtopic.

Let me wrap up the Proviso-Mormon thing with comments on the Mormon-hierarchy issue which weighs so heavily on so many of the characters.

First: I have a hard time believing it. I come across it so often in Mormon fiction (of all stripes) that I guess it must exist, but the idea that people structure their selfworth around obtaining "higher" and "higher" callings seems implausible to me. Perhaps a few, but can it really be so rampant? Those of you Mormons who are still reading, please comment on this. Do people really lust after and seek after callings? And not in a casual daydreamy way, but in an ambitious-caesar kind of way. Please. Enlighten me. Because if people do, they're idiots. And they have no understanding of our doctrine.

Sigh.....

*

Anyway. Despite my owning a paper copy, The Proviso is primarily being marketed by its publisher as an ebook. Just wanted to mention that. And having mentioned that, here are my last few thoughts before I call this good and walk away:

1. Visit http://theproviso.com/. Speaking of added value, here you get some. The first 200pages as a free download and the sites filled with little datums and factoids and excerpts and thises and thats. If you're interested but merely want to know more, go there. 2. Ummmmm. I thought I had more to say. But it's gone. But that's all right. I've said enough. 3. But I will say that for my issues with the book, overall I quite enjoyed it. I'm excited to read a couple of the other books in the Dunham series (no need to read in order), notably the post-apocalyptic one and the bishop-and-the-whore one. If she can make me find restructuring interesting, I'm sure she'll succeed there.

buy from amazon

LDS Eros: Mo' Moriah, mo' Jovan

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055) Paso Doble by Moriah Jovan, finished July 7

If you're not familiar with Moriah's work, you might check out my reviews of The Proviso or Magdalene. Paso Doble shares their DNA. As with all the Dunham books, the lead characters are enormous, godlike figures who tower over the landscape. Victoria is a Dunham cousin and 1) a multilingual polymath and a leading scholar of ESL, 2) a wildly talented lounge singer, 3) the most beautiful woman in Europe. Emilio is a close friend and mentor to a Dunham cousin and 1) the greatest matador of his generation, 2) an exquisitely talented lovemaker, 3) a genius chemist. These are the sorts of things we expect from Jovan protagonists. But they are difficult characters to hate because they are also deeply flawed---and their flaws flow from their godlike attributes.

Victoria, aware is a genius and beautiful, pushes everyone's buttons. She can't get tenure and no man can put up with her. Especially since, as a devout Mormon, she's keeping her garments on until marriage. Most guys can't put up with her nearly long enough for that. Plus, she has very little patience for other people and, being incapable of taking offence, can very easily offend. She's become emotionally distant from just about everyone.

Emilio is also emotionally distant---he's as desired by the opposite sex, but his distance comes from frequent partaking. He has not room for emotional depth because he gives a little to so many. Plus, he's a natural introvert and finds people exhausting. His reputation as a notoriously sexed-up tabloid-popular matador gets him blacklisted from university jobs and he can't stand working as an assembly-line chemist. And so he's trapped in a glamorous career he's grown out of.

So these two sad and lonely gods must collide.

I've labeled this post part of the LDS Eros series because what I'm most interested in from a Mormon-literature standpoint is Moriah's navigation of this relationship between a "manslut" and an "ice-vagina." Or, more importantly, someone for whom sex has been cheap and someone who holds it so dear she demands another's life in exchange for access. (That might sound melodramatic, but I think it's a fair description of how it seems on the outside to many people.)

It's a clash of sexual cultures---and cultures that are diverging at speed. People embarrassed to be virgins at 20 are written about with the same bemused pity as those who choose virginity until marriage at age 29. We have two soulmates and the rules state they must get together. But in addition to the little navigations every relationship must make, they have a massive gulf between them called divergent sexual norms. And that's the most striking element of their story.

Additionally, speaking as a male writer, Moriah's descriptions of Victoria's (female) sexual need and confusion provide me with vocabulary I would not otherwise have. I know her work is too explicit for many Mormon writers, but I think you shoudl read her anyway. We need to deal with sexuality more as a people and reading her work is a great place to consider how it can be done. Even if most of us will not show her happy delight in the word cock.

So how does Paso Doble stack up against her other works? I've read the first three and (I'm well into the fourth and will start the sixth [about Victoria's twin] before the week is out) and I would rank the one's I've read this this (in terms of IMPORTANCE):

1. Magdalene

This is simply great literature. In my opinion, one of the most important Mormon books in recent memory.

2. The Proviso

A flawed novel, but massive in scale and quantity of ideas. My least favorite, but you can't deny its ambition.

3. Paso Doble

Charming fun. Interesting work with sexuality but clumsy in the penultimate chapters and while a delightful lark, not IMPORTANT.

3 (tie). Stay

Equal to Paso Doble, though cleaner in execution. More ideas here, less there. It's a wash.

In the end, Paso Doble is a fun read, especially if you like to laugh at the foibles of gods---while falling in love with them yourselves---and a useful read, if you want to think about ways to attack sex from a Mormon standpoint.

two months



Previously in 2014 . . . . :

Unlucky 13th Five

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note: two of today's authors are featured in my post today for motley vision

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065) Hooper Haller by Dean Hughes, finished July 18

I first read this as a child, borrowed from my grandmother's personal library. I remember nothing of what I thought of it then. My grandmother has since passed away and this passed into my own library. Not because of the Big O's baseball obsession (he wasn't walking then) but because I had taken a class from the author and he had served as an important mentor to me. Anyway, because of the baseball obsession, I chose this book to read to the boys. Eldon Haller is from small town Hooper, Utah (near Ogden) where he was a master of the mound for his high school baseball team. He's drafted by the Royals and heads to Kansas City. Hughes is a notable writer of baseball books and the game scenes crackle. Biggo loved those. But the parts about the girl or Eldon's existential crises or buying a car or flying on planes or sitting my a stream or somebody's little brother dying? Not nearly so good. Which is why it took us so long to finish. One-sitting picture books are still the lit of choice around here. Because it took us so long (and because I had to reread the games scenes and read the rest while trying to play catch at the same time), I really don't know how good this particular book is. But it certainly wasn't bad. I would read its sequel. But if you're considering reading a Dean Hughes YA book (and don't particularly care whether it's one of the DB-published ones), may I recommend Millie Wilenheimer and the Chestnut Corporation (funny and about money) and Family Pose (serious and about hotels)? months

064) Stay by Moriah Jovan (MS POLICY), finished July 15

My faith that I put in Moriah after reading The Proviso was justified. This book is good. Parts of it are excellent. And it's still only a draft. It still has explicit sex (though not as much) but you should have no other qualms about checking this one out when it's released in a few months. Congratulations, Moriah, on a great book. Keep 'em coming. MS POLICY one month

063) The Question: The Five Books of Blood by Greg Rucka et al, finished July 14

A fairly interesting idea based on a beloved character, but disappointing. Basically, there is a religion of crime whose sacred work stars Cain and Lilith and, yeah, doesn't pay off. Too bad. about half and hour plus a couple minutes the next morning

062) Daisy Kutter: The Last Train by Kazu Kibuishi, finished July 13

Page one is below. If you want my take, proceed to Fob Comics. like half an hour, max

061) Gravity vs. the Girl by Riley Noehren, finished July 11

Before I started this book, I thought I would compare it to this book, which, though I haven't read it, is a Minx (and I've reviewed several) and has, at least on the surface, a similar conceit. But Good as Lily's just gonna have to wait for me to read it because this book deserves much more than comparison to an unread comic. Gravity vs. the Girl is that rarest of beasts: the Good Comic novel. I don't know why this beast is so rare. There is no reason on this earth that comic novels shouldn't be excellent. But they rarely are. Most comic novels I've read have inconsistent character development, bad plotting, di ex machina, and other grievous sins mostly born of laziness. The worst this book does is misspell Macauley Culkin. Anyway. Back to the conceit. (I'll let the backcopy do the heavylifting.) "Samantha Green has just spent an entire year in her pajamas, and she is beginning to regret it. What's more, she is haunted by four ghosts that are former versions of herself. First up is the overachieving and materialistic attorney, who is furious with Samantha for throwing away the career she worked so hard to build. Second is the lackadaisical college student who is high on life but low on responsibility. Next is the melodramatic teenager, who is consumed with her social standing, teal eyeliner and teased bangs. Finally, there is the scrappy six-year old, whose only objective is to overcome gravity so that she can fly." That's all you need to know about the story. Now I'm going to spout some stuff that will hopefully make you think I'm smart or at least Mormon and then I'll close by suggesting you read the book. In order for Samantha to move forward with her life, she first needs to move backwards, giving the text a chiastic structure that is understated and quite successful. Even after I began to see how things were unfolding, the final ghost's raison d'être was strong enough to justify its role as the entire book's foundation. I'm impressed by the book's cohesiveness. A game like the one Noehren is playing here is easy to screw up but there are no false steps here. And when the book offers lessons it does so in an honest way --- as opposed to most comic novel's that feel a need to preachify to excuse their funniness. BEING FUNNY IS NOT A CRIME. This book knows that and feels no shame in making you laugh. So refreshing. It closing up with an epilogue even Edgy could love that provides unusually perfect bookending. And although there is nothing explicitly Mormon about this book, it's clean enough to recommend to my mother. So no one here will feel the need to feel betrayed. Anyway. Buy your own copy. about three weeks

Previously:

060) The Dud Avocado by Elaine Dundy, finished July 1 059) Letters from a Nut by Ted. L. Nancy, finished June 21 058) The Tales of Beedle the Bard by J.K. Rowling, finished June 21 057) Lowboy by John Wray, finished June 16 056) One silent sleepless night by Spencer W. Kimball, finished June 14 055) Blue Beetle: Boundaries by Sturges/Albuquerque/Coelho, finished June 6 054) [title in flux] (MS) by B.G. Christensen, finished June 5 053) Invincible Volume 1: Family Matters words by Robert Kirkman, pictures by Cory Walker, finished June 3 052) Der Ostwind (MS) by Kohl Glass, finished June 2 051) The Rumpelstiltskin Problem by Vivian Vande Velde, finished June 2 050) The Bible Salesman by Clyde Edgerton, finished June 2 049) Superman / Madman Hullabaloo! by the Allreds, finished May 29 048) Beyond Fair Chase: The Ethic and Tradition of Hunting by Jim Posewitz, finished May 26 047) Brave and the Bold: Demons and Dragons by Mark Waid et al, finished May 20 046) Atonement by Ian McEwan, finished May 20 045) Love and the Light: An Idyl of the Westland by Orson Ferguson Whitney, finished May 20 044) Tales Of The Batman: Tim Sale by Tim Sale and some motley group of writers, finished May 17 043) Catwoman: The Dark End of the Street by Ed Brubaker et al, finished May 13 042) Aztek - the Ultimate Man by Grant Morrison), Mark Millar, Keith Champagne, Steven Harris; finished May 11 041) Cypher by Brad Teare, finished May 7 040) My Faith in Frankie by Mike Carey, Sonny Liew, Marc Hempel, finished May 5 039) Janes in Love by Cecil Castellucci and Jim Rugg, finished May 5 038) Batman: R.I.P. by Grant Morrison et al, finished May 4 037) 1000 Steps To World Domination by Rob Osborne, finished May 4 036) 110 Per¢ by Tony Consiglio, finished May 4 035) Mendoza in Hollywood by Kage Baker, finished May Day 034) All Star Superman, Vol. 2 by Grant Morrison, and Frank Quitely and Jamie Grant, finished April 22 033) All Star Superman, Vol. 1 by Grant Morrison, and Frank Quitely and Jamie Grant, finished April 20 032) Bound on Earth by Angela Hallstrom, finished April 19 031) Batman: The Resurrection of Ra's Al Ghul by Grant Morrison and colleagues, finished April 18 030) Madman Atomic Comics Volume 2 by Mike Allred with Laura Allred, finished April 14 029) For a Good Time by K. Voss, finished April 11 028) The Greatest Batman Stories Ever Told, finished April 11 027) Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury, finished April 6 026) Elegant Enigmas: The Art of Edward Gorey by Karen Wilkin (essay) and Edward Gorey (art), finished April 5 025) Owly: A Time to be Brave by Andy Runton, finished April 1 024) Blue Beetle: Endgame by John Rogers and Rafaele Albuquerque, finished March 29 023) Blue Beetle: Reach for the Stars by Rogers, Torres, Albuqerque; finished March 26 022) The Complete Peanuts 1967-1968 by Charles M. Schulz, finished March 25 021) Blue Beetle: Road Trip by various, finished March 25 020) Love That Dog by Sharon Creech, finished March 18 019) Weetzie Bat by Francesca Lia Block, finished March 17 018) The Proviso by Moriah Jovan, finished March 16 017) An Ensign to the Nations: History of the Oakland State by Evelyn Candland, finished March 7 016) Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus by Mary Shelley, finished February 27 015) Batman: The Black Glove by Grant Morrison and Tony Daniel and J.H. Williams III, finished February 23 014) The Hot Zone: A Terrifying True Story by Richard Preston, finished February 22 013) Lex Luthor: Man of Steel by Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo, finished February 19 012) Blue Beetle: Shellshocked by Keith Giffen and Cully Hammer, finished February 18 011) The Joker by Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo, finished February 17 010) Watchmen by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons, finished February 18 009) Superman: Red Son by MJR&M, finished February 11 008) The Best American Comics 2008 edited by Lynda Barry, finished February 9 007) The Blot by Tom Neely, finished February 6 006) JSA: Darkness Falls by Goyer, Johns, et al, finished January 28 005) The Road by Cormac McCarthy, finished January 24 004) Poor Sailor by Sammy Harkham, finished January 19 003) The Waitress was New by Dominique Fabre and translated by Jordan Stump, finished January 19 002) Stagger Lee by Derek McCulloch and Shepherd Hendrix, finished January 12? 001) The Arrival by Shaun Tan, finished January 8

the first five, 1-5
the second five, 6-10
the third five, 11-15
the fourth five, 16-20
the fifth five, 21-25
the sixth five, 26-30
the seventh five, 31-35
the eighth five, 36-40
the ninth five, 41-45
the tenth five, 46-50
the eleventh five, 51-55
the twelfth five, 56-60

Fifth Five Books of 2009

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025) Owly: A Time to be Brave by Andy Runton, finished April 1

Too cute for its own good.

like five minutes

024) Blue Beetle: Endgame by John Rogers and Rafaele Albuquerque, finished March 29

Excellent. This may be the best mainstream, action, superhero comic I've ever read. It was genuinely exciting and emotionally involving and it even made me tear up. The moment where Jaime said Blue Beetles don't need superpowers, for instance, and some of the family moments. Then the nearly-all-in-Spanish issue was great too, even for a gringo like me. The postscripted translation was nice but not necessary.

HOWEVER. If I have attracted your interest and you're now thinking "Okay. This is the one I will read." you are making a mistake. This book will not work fully without having read the first three first.

Also: don't miss my Fobcomics post on Blue Beetle.

three days

023) Blue Beetle: Reach for the Stars by Rogers, Torres, Albuqerque; finished March 26

Excepting occasional minor missteps, this series just keeps getting better and better.

two days

022) The Complete Peanuts 1967-1968 by Charles M. Schulz, finished March 25

I love every one of these volumes. What more can I need from this life? And Schulz is a genius. Who else could make a handwritten "Now, what kind of question is that?" a night-after-night bellylaugh?

about three months

021) Blue Beetle: Road Trip by various, finished March 25

He's great. I've said more here.

a week or so maybe two

Previously:

020) Love That Dog by Sharon Creech, finished March 18
019) Weetzie Bat by Francesca Lia Block, finished March 17
018) The Proviso by Moriah Jovan, finished March 16
017) An Ensign to the Nations: History of the Oakland State by Evelyn Candland, finished March 7
016) Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus by Mary Shelley, finished February 27
015) Batman: The Black Glove by Grant Morrison and Tony Daniel and J.H. Williams III, finished February 23
014) The Hot Zone: A Terrifying True Story by Richard Preston, finished February 22
013) Lex Luthor: Man of Steel by Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo, finished February 19
012) Blue Beetle: Shellshocked by Keith Giffen and Cully Hammer, finished February 18
011) The Joker by Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo, finished February 17
010) Watchmen by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons, finished February 18
009) Superman: Red Son by MJR&M, finished February 11
008) The Best American Comics 2008 edited by Lynda Barry, finished February 9
007) The Blot by Tom Neely, finished February 6
006) JSA: Darkness Falls by Goyer, Johns, et al, finished January 28
005) The Road by Cormac McCarthy, finished January 24
004) Poor Sailor by Sammy Harkham, finished January 19
003) The Waitress was New by Dominique Fabre and translated by Jordan Stump, finished January 19
002) Stagger Lee by Derek McCulloch and Shepherd Hendrix, finished January 12?
001) The Arrival by Shaun Tan, finished January 8

Have a Very Theric New Year (or, you know, last minute christmas shopping or whatever)

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2013 is drawing to a close, but 2014 is about to emerge from it's papery ashes. And what better way to celebrate the new year than with the old year's thericky goodness? Some of which, I might add, is still quite fresh?

The first thing to mention is the two Christmas anthologies I was included in this year, one heart-warming, one heart-charring (click any picture in this post to get to Amazon):

I also have a hymn and a personal remembrance of how I came to write it in a collection of goddess literature. I don't have my copy yet (it's in the mail), so I can only guess whether or not I'm the only one holding down the Mormon fort in this volume, but I'm quite curious to see how well my work fits in amongst its pagan peers.

Of course, the other thing I was promoting recently is "The Great Mormon Novel of the 21st Century" which has been doing okay business on the Amazon. So far, no reviews online so you still can take my word for it that it's the finest piece of literature so far this century. I mean---no one's said otherwise---how can you doubt it?

Humility constrains me to mention that when you buy an anthology with my work in it, I can't guarantee the quality of the work generally. Just consider that a general disclaimer. I do, however, guarantee satisfaction for my own work

And, of course, the granddaddy of Thericonia released in 2013, the paperback version of Byuck. Excerpts of reviews quoted on or submitted to the Amazon page:

"I guess part of me also wants to throw in the towel, forget all of the analytic crap that goes with being a critic, and write what I want to say: THIS BOOK IS HILARIOUS! READ IT, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!" - Scott Hales, Association for Mormon Letters

A lot of people have compared Byuck to Napoleon Dynamite and . . . The Death of a Disco Dancer. . . . I kept thinking of John Kennedy Toole's A Confederacy of Dunces. The plot's not similar but it has some of that creative chaos that makes Confederacy so memorable. --- Doug Gibson, the Standard-Examiner

"If you ever wanted to know what would have happened if Godot had shown up, read Byuck, wherein coffee tables are transgressive and Billy Joel claims to be innocent. I LOL'd. For real. Not like you do online where you just kind of huff with a mouth twitch. No, I totally LOL'd. Woke up the cat." -- Moriah Jovan, author of The Proviso and Magdalene

"With humor and affection, Theric Jepson creates a story that gleans the best from both the romantic comedy tradition and the literary LDS tradition. Snappy dialogue and quirky characters make Byuck an enjoyable read for book clubs and Mormon literature enthusiasts." -- Laura Craner, A Motley Vision

If Dave Eggers had gone to BYU, this is what he would have written. A pitch perfect voice and a lot of very funny lines. -- Daftwooly

You know the first five minutes of Moulin Rouge, where the main character starts singing "The hills are alive....with the sound of music.." And you think "...huh...okay, that's kinda random, but sure..." And then once you've embraced the quirkiness, a sweet, unexpected, delicious love story falls into your hands, all the more tasty because of the what-the-heck, random quirks. You know? Well, that's the first few chapters of Byuck. It's like the first 10 seconds of Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along-Blog after he breaks into song in the introductory scene. Or the first fight scene in Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. Stick with it, because like all those stories I mentioned, this is totally worth it. -- Satsuki

4th5-2009

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020) Love That Dog by Sharon Creech, finished March 18

This book is a short, brief read. Won't take you past an afternoon. It's the tale of Jack who, at first, refuses to right poetry (it's for girls) who becomes pretty decent. I just learned that Creech release a sequel last year, so I'm excited to go check that out.

three months

019) Weetzie Bat by Francesca Lia Block, finished March 17

This short little novella caught me off guard. I picked it up because it was small and would fit in a small spot I wanted to keep a book in. I did not expect to really get into it. I certainly did not expect to love it. But I did and I do.

I don't think I've ever had such a revelatory experience with a book. Reading this book was like cutting the Gordian Knot. Reading this book means I am already pages into a book of my own that's been on the shelf for years now.

Weetzie Bat is easy to dismiss as frivolous (or even immoral), but it is lovely and charming and utterly, to me, inspiring.

You will likely hear me mention this book again.

a couple weeks

018) The Proviso by Moriah Jovan, finished March 16

I think, on this book, I have already been longwinded enough.

a few months

017) An Ensign to the Nations: History of the Oakland State by Evelyn Candland, finished March 7

This book is great. Every stake should have a history written about it. I learned a lot about the history of the Church in my area and I now feel actually a part of the stake community of the stake in which I now live. I know how the Oakland stake convinced the French government that Mormon missionaries are not spies. I learned about a popular radio broadcast we once gave. I learned about the stake president who died less than a year after being called. I learned that the Interstake Center used to be red brick. And the passion and inspiration that allowed the Oakland Temple to be built.


Every stake should have a book like this.

four months or maybe more

016) Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus by Mary Shelley, finished February 27

I bought this in high school and loved it.

Then didn't touch it for fifteen or so years.

And now? Later?

Still a good book. Some of the writing is a bit clunky, but from what I know, that's probably at least partially to blame on Percy who rewrote parts of it and made it more convoluted.

And get this: she was 19 when she wrote this book. Nineteen!

This book makes me feel like an old man.....

about three weeks

Previously:

015) Batman: The Black Glove by Grant Morrison and Tony Daniel and J.H. Williams III, finished February 23
014) The Hot Zone: A Terrifying True Story by Richard Preston, finished February 22
013) Lex Luthor: Man of Steel by Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo, finished February 19
012) Blue Beetle: Shellshocked by Keith Giffen and Cully Hammer, finished February 18
011) The Joker by Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo, finished February 17
010) Watchmen by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons, finished February 18
009) Superman: Red Son by MJR&M, finished February 11
008) The Best American Comics 2008 edited by Lynda Barry, finished February 9
007) The Blot by Tom Neely, finished February 6
006) JSA: Darkness Falls by Goyer, Johns, et al, finished January 28
005) The Road by Cormac McCarthy, finished January 24
004) Poor Sailor by Sammy Harkham, finished January 19
003) The Waitress was New by Dominique Fabre and translated by Jordan Stump, finished January 19
002) Stagger Lee by Derek McCulloch and Shepherd Hendrix, finished January 12?
001) The Arrival by Shaun Tan, finished January 8

five books --- fcbd edition

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Saturday, as I'm sure you observed, was Free Comic Book Day. But because of tball we arrived at celebrations too late to take full advantage of the bounty.

Fortunately, Ben lent me a quantity of his DC library that day, and Comic Relief had a big table of books for around a buck, so even if I didn't bring much free loot into my personal library, it was a good day.

Here are five books from that day (others will be forthcoming). No bonus points for guessing which one was Ben's.

040) My Faith in Frankie by Mike Carey, Sonny Liew, Marc Hempel, finished May 5

I knew as I read this book that it came from the same inkwells as Re-Gifters. What I didn't realize is that it was the same writing as well. In fact, skew Re-Gifters a little older, add some sex and supernatural elements, and a blind man could see that they share the same genesis. Read more by clicking the picture below.



an evening

039) Janes in Love by Cecil Castellucci and Jim Rugg, finished May 5

Not as good as the first, but not bad at all. (read more)



two days

038) Batman: R.I.P. by Grant Morrison et al, finished May 4

This book gave me unsettled dreams the night after I finished it. If that's sounds like a recommendation, take it as one. But you'll need to read at least the prior two collections to hope to make sense of it (1 and 2 and a bonus)

So for all the ballyhoo, there is no body for either the Joker or Batman and, as we all know, no body means no death. So there you go.

Although the free copy of Blackest Night makes me quite uncertain as to Batman's health. When did he get lasered by aliens exactly?

(Also: I'm in love with Beryl. I want to see her with Robin more often.)

But did I like this book? Yes I did. Nice Batman story. But not one to read to the kiddies. Oh my no.

three days

037) 1000 Steps To World Domination by Rob Osborne, finished May 4

Click on your favorite to read my review.
(And led us know what you clicked in the comments there.)




one day

036) 110 Per¢ by Tony Consiglio, finished May 4

Whar's she goin? Why to read my review of course. Click her to follow.



breakfast

Previously:

035) Mendoza in Hollywood by Kage Baker, finished May Day
034) All Star Superman, Vol. 2 by Grant Morrison, and Frank Quitely and Jamie Grant, finished April 22
033) All Star Superman, Vol. 1 by Grant Morrison, and Frank Quitely and Jamie Grant, finished April 20
032) Bound on Earth by Angela Hallstrom, finished April 19
031) Batman: The Resurrection of Ra's Al Ghul by Grant Morrison and colleagues, finished April 18
030) Madman Atomic Comics Volume 2 by Mike Allred with Laura Allred, finished April 14
029) For a Good Time by K. Voss, finished April 11
028) The Greatest Batman Stories Ever Told, finished April 11
027) Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury, finished April 6
026)Elegant Enigmas: The Art of Edward Gorey by Karen Wilkin (essay) and Edward Gorey (art), finished April 5
025) Owly: A Time to be Brave by Andy Runton, finished April 1
024) Blue Beetle: Endgame by John Rogers and Rafaele Albuquerque, finished March 29
023) Blue Beetle: Reach for the Stars by Rogers, Torres, Albuqerque; finished March 26
022) The Complete Peanuts 1967-1968 by Charles M. Schulz, finished March 25
021) Blue Beetle: Road Trip by various, finished March 25
020) Love That Dog by Sharon Creech, finished March 18
019) Weetzie Bat by Francesca Lia Block, finished March 17
018) The Proviso by Moriah Jovan, finished March 16
017) An Ensign to the Nations: History of the Oakland State by Evelyn Candland, finished March 7
016) Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus by Mary Shelley, finished February 27
015) Batman: The Black Glove by Grant Morrison and Tony Daniel and J.H. Williams III, finished February 23
014) The Hot Zone: A Terrifying True Story by Richard Preston, finished February 22
013) Lex Luthor: Man of Steel by Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo, finished February 19
012) Blue Beetle: Shellshocked by Keith Giffen and Cully Hammer, finished February 18
011) The Joker by Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo, finished February 17
010) Watchmen by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons, finished February 18
009) Superman: Red Son by MJR&M, finished February 11
008) The Best American Comics 2008 edited by Lynda Barry, finished February 9
007) The Blot by Tom Neely, finished February 6
006) JSA: Darkness Falls by Goyer, Johns, et al, finished January 28
005) The Road by Cormac McCarthy, finished January 24
004) Poor Sailor by Sammy Harkham, finished January 19
003) The Waitress was New by Dominique Fabre and translated by Jordan Stump, finished January 19
002) Stagger Lee by Derek McCulloch and Shepherd Hendrix, finished January 12?
001) The Arrival by Shaun Tan, finished January 8

the first five, 1-5
the second five, 6-10
the third five, 11-15
the fourth five, 16-20
the fifth five, 21-25
the sixth five, 26-30
the seventh five, 31-35

Books of 2009 (46-50)

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050) The Bible Salesman by Clyde Edgerton, finished June 2

On the cover, David Sedaris has written "How good it feels to throw back one's head and howl with a great comic novel. The 'burial tuck' alone should make The Bible Salesman a classic." Yeah. Whatever, David. The burial-tuck scene was far from hilarious and it appeared in the first few pages, making me wonder if you even read this thing. But the beginning was intriguing, the story of a young man who's decided to make a living selling Bibles getting conned by a faux FBI agent into joining a car-theft ring. It had potential. But then the endless pointless flashbacks to his childhood and cutting away from a scene just as it's reaching its comic potential (the bra scene, for example; boy wearing bra so his cousin can practice taking it off when mother figure walks in then the author cuts away and never returns). The moments of sex and violence at the end brought some life back into the book, but not enough, and what looked like an interesting dialogue on biblical truth was never followed through on. In one sense this book made me feel good: at least it's not just Mormon comic novelists who can't get it right. I do have one question for you ladies out there (feel free to answer anonymously): I keep running into this in the weirdest most unexpected places and so I need to ask: Those of you with sufficiently large breasts and sufficiently flexible necks, do you spend a lot of time biting or licking yourself? Because I can't seem to get away from it of late and it's starting to seem . . . ubiquitous. twenty days

049) Superman / Madman Hullabaloo! by the Allreds, finished May 29

Short, sweet, delightfully fun. let's call it a week

048) Beyond Fair Chase: The Ethic and Tradition of Hunting by Jim Posewitz, finished May 26

This short and plain volume contains the basics of what it means to be an ethical hunter. And I hope hunters follow this philosophy. I'm trying to think of my hunting cousins and believe that they behave this way and . . . it's not the easiest thing I've ever attempted. Portions of this book got me the closest I've ever been to wanting to hunt. Which I think helps to explain my next statement: Hunter-hating conservationists should read this book. It's not long. You could read it in a quiet afternoon. depends on whether or not you count all the false starts but at least six months and maybe three times that long

047) Brave and the Bold: Demons and Dragons by Mark Waid et al, finished May 20

Still silly but the old stories at the back were better. I was especially enamored of the one Waid did not write but cites as a reference. It had some definite problems, but a good story. In case you didn't read me talking about previous books in the series, The Brave and the Bold features teamups between characters in one-shot stories. For instance, this one had a Superman/Catwoman story. That sort of thing. a few days

046) Atonement by Ian McEwan, finished May 20

Taking eight months to read a book, as I did this one, means that it is difficult to say for certain how excellent its parts are. Perhaps some lesser parts have been lost to memory. But I can say with certitude that this is an excellent book and I can recommend it heartily. Reading Atonement lets me know which aspects of On Chesil Beach where typical McEwan. Long poetic descriptions, for instance. (Not boring per se, but long and poetic and descriptive.) I will be reading more McEwan. I think a short story collection next..... eight months

Previously:

045) Love and the Light: An Idyl of the Westland by Orson Ferguson Whitney, finished May 20 044) Tales Of The Batman: Tim Sale by Tim Sale and some motley group of writers, finished May 17 043) Catwoman: The Dark End of the Street by Ed Brubaker et al, finished May 13 042) Aztek - the Ultimate Man by Grant Morrison), Mark Millar, Keith Champagne, Steven Harris; finished May 11 041) Cypher by Brad Teare, finished May 7 040) My Faith in Frankie by Mike Carey, Sonny Liew, Marc Hempel, finished May 5 039) Janes in Love by Cecil Castellucci and Jim Rugg, finished May 5 038) Batman: R.I.P. by Grant Morrison et al, finished May 4 037) 1000 Steps To World Domination by Rob Osborne, finished May 4 036) 110 Per¢ by Tony Consiglio, finished May 4 035) Mendoza in Hollywood by Kage Baker, finished May Day 034) All Star Superman, Vol. 2 by Grant Morrison, and Frank Quitely and Jamie Grant, finished April 22 033) All Star Superman, Vol. 1 by Grant Morrison, and Frank Quitely and Jamie Grant, finished April 20 032) Bound on Earth by Angela Hallstrom, finished April 19 031) Batman: The Resurrection of Ra's Al Ghul by Grant Morrison and colleagues, finished April 18 030) Madman Atomic Comics Volume 2 by Mike Allred with Laura Allred, finished April 14 029) For a Good Time by K. Voss, finished April 11 028) The Greatest Batman Stories Ever Told, finished April 11 027) Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury, finished April 6 026)Elegant Enigmas: The Art of Edward Gorey by Karen Wilkin (essay) and Edward Gorey (art), finished April 5 025) Owly: A Time to be Brave by Andy Runton, finished April 1 024) Blue Beetle: Endgame by John Rogers and Rafaele Albuquerque, finished March 29 023) Blue Beetle: Reach for the Stars by Rogers, Torres, Albuqerque; finished March 26 022) The Complete Peanuts 1967-1968 by Charles M. Schulz, finished March 25 021) Blue Beetle: Road Trip by various, finished March 25 020) Love That Dog by Sharon Creech, finished March 18 019) Weetzie Bat by Francesca Lia Block, finished March 17 018) The Proviso by Moriah Jovan, finished March 16 017) An Ensign to the Nations: History of the Oakland State by Evelyn Candland, finished March 7 016) Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus by Mary Shelley, finished February 27 015) Batman: The Black Glove by Grant Morrison and Tony Daniel and J.H. Williams III, finished February 23 014) The Hot Zone: A Terrifying True Story by Richard Preston, finished February 22 013) Lex Luthor: Man of Steel by Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo, finished February 19 012) Blue Beetle: Shellshocked by Keith Giffen and Cully Hammer, finished February 18 011) The Joker by Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo, finished February 17 010) Watchmen by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons, finished February 18 009) Superman: Red Son by MJR&M, finished February 11 008) The Best American Comics 2008 edited by Lynda Barry, finished February 9 007) The Blot by Tom Neely, finished February 6 006) JSA: Darkness Falls by Goyer, Johns, et al, finished January 28 005) The Road by Cormac McCarthy, finished January 24 004) Poor Sailor by Sammy Harkham, finished January 19 003) The Waitress was New by Dominique Fabre and translated by Jordan Stump, finished January 19 002) Stagger Lee by Derek McCulloch and Shepherd Hendrix, finished January 12? 001) The Arrival by Shaun Tan, finished January 8

the first five, 1-5
the second five, 6-10
the third five, 11-15
the fourth five, 16-20
the fifth five, 21-25
the sixth five, 26-30
the seventh five, 31-35
the eighth five, 36-40
the ninth five, 41-45