Paging Dr Freud, MFA

S. King.

Last night, in my dreams, I was in a small town. They were having their annual outdoors food event thing and, as usual, Stephen King had come to help cook. I thought I would take the opportunity to say hey I think you're pretty great but came off really awkward, saying something pathetic about On Writing and he, though polite, was pretty dismissive of me and I was just about to sulk stupidly off when I noticed he was wearing an Arkham Tales tshirt under his fleece. Hey! I said. Arkham Tales! I just published a story with them?

Oh? he said warily. Which story?

Happy St. Patrick's Day.

And then he got quite excited. He began instructing me in how to go about getting it turned into a movie. He left his post and we stepped inside a bookstore and he grabbed book after book on storyboarding. Finally he sent me on my way to --- I don't know --- Hollywood, I guess --- laden with books.

The thing was, I'm really not sure how closely he read the story. He didn't even get that it was about **********s.

Did you?

(Note: those of you warned off this story earlier should remain warned off it now.)


  1. .

    It just occurred to me that maybe the whole thing was still just a ruse to get rid of me.

    Am I really that annoying?

  2. Or maybe Mr. King just doesn't get It...

  3. Since I was 17 I've had around 23 dreams similar to yours except instead of Stephen King it's always George Lucas, sometimes Steven Spielberg is with him, but most times not.

    Are these men our heroes?

    If so we're aiming a little low aren't we?

    I mean I've never had a dream with Hitchcock, Kurosawa, or Miyazaki.

  4. .

    I don't know. I mean --- I love Hitchcock above all else, but I'm leery suggesting that Lucas or Spielberg are bad models. How do we know who will last the ages? I mean come on, that uneducated upstart Shakespeare? The guy who wrote Titus Andronicus? Are you kidding me?

  5. So you think Shakespeare is only who we have always been told he is? I lean towards him really being Sir Francis Bacon, or at least someone in the same circle as Bacon, not an uneducated actor whoc ould barely spell his own name.

    Tangent, sorry. Iused to always meet celebrity's in my dreams, usually rock stars. The one time I met Poison ,I did tell them they sucked.

    So in the dream, did you think he was giving you the brush off or just after you awoke?

  6. .

    Only at first. When he was giving me books, no. I didn't think of that until a day or so after I wrote this post. (Which is why it didn't appear until the comments.)

    You can't be serious about Bacon though. Or any nonShakespeare theory. If the theories were older than about 150 years I could maybe give them credence, but his contemporaries despised his lack of education and proper upbringing. If there was any chance he didn't write them himself, they would have shouted it out from the very beginning. But all they could do was smolder.