.
RRrrRrRRRrrrRrrRr
.png)
2011-08-30
2011-08-28
A Return to Svithing
.
So since taking my more relaxed view of svithing, my amount of svithing has dropped more than I expected.
=========================================
REMINDER:
For those who don't know or recall, svithing is an idea I hit upon back in 2006 when Lady Steed and I first started paying for internet. This is from the post when I first explained the concept:
=========================================
While I still feel that forcing myself to write a svithe every week even when crappy isn't necessary --- especially now that I'm not blogging every week --- I am going to be more regular.
One reason svithing got difficult that I never mentioned was that I was writing svithe-like emails to my elders quorum on a near-weekly basis for over two years. And I didn't want to be redundant, but coming up with two religious "treatises" a week weren't easy.
But now those are fallow and forgotten and those that will work for a more general audience, I think I will recycle. Plus, I can start posting Classic Svithes again. Really, I can start svithing again without ever writing an original word. Ever.
But next week we'll start with something fresh and new and we'll go from there.
Will I post every week? I don't guarantee it. I'm too forgetful. But I am going to start svithing more regularly.
Promise.
How else will I know what's important, if I don't write and figure it out?
Svithe you next week.
So since taking my more relaxed view of svithing, my amount of svithing has dropped more than I expected.
=========================================
REMINDER:
For those who don't know or recall, svithing is an idea I hit upon back in 2006 when Lady Steed and I first started paying for internet. This is from the post when I first explained the concept:
I love me a good portmanteau. Such is the word svithe: a blending of seven and tithe. And if a tithe is the tenth given to God, then a svithe is the seventh given to God.
I did not make up this idea; I took it from the Sabbath--the one day in seven dedicated to God. The properly observed Sabbath would be a svithe.
In other news, I have an addictive personality. I don't say this to warn you against meeting me in person lest you lose control of yourself and lock me in your backwoods cabin in order to enjoy scintillating conversation the rest of your life. No, what I mean is that I tend towards addiction. (As if I didn't have enough reasons already not to try heroin just one time.) I will often spend too much time doing my current fancy at the expense of more important things.
I maybe might just maybe be addicted to blogging.
Part of my redemption is this svithing. Every Sunday I write a post that is intended to be godly. The idea being that I may do some good somehow someday for someone. Certainly the svithes a have better chance than posts about poop.
Sometimes I will not have much to say, but whenever I can be online on a Sunday, I will svithe.
=========================================
While I still feel that forcing myself to write a svithe every week even when crappy isn't necessary --- especially now that I'm not blogging every week --- I am going to be more regular.
One reason svithing got difficult that I never mentioned was that I was writing svithe-like emails to my elders quorum on a near-weekly basis for over two years. And I didn't want to be redundant, but coming up with two religious "treatises" a week weren't easy.
But now those are fallow and forgotten and those that will work for a more general audience, I think I will recycle. Plus, I can start posting Classic Svithes again. Really, I can start svithing again without ever writing an original word. Ever.
But next week we'll start with something fresh and new and we'll go from there.
Will I post every week? I don't guarantee it. I'm too forgetful. But I am going to start svithing more regularly.
Promise.
How else will I know what's important, if I don't write and figure it out?
Svithe you next week.
2011-08-25
The Lysol Story
.
Large S has had the mad vomits today and so I lamented that we didn't have any Lysol to, you know, kills germs the easy way with.
Lady Steed said we did so have Lysol.
Ha ha, I said, mocking her unwarranted certainty.
She told me where, but I didn't bother to look until I was passing by anyway. Sure enough, three new bottles bundled in plastic. So I meaculpaed and started to open them when Lady Steed told me to STOP! We have some already opened!
Ha ha, I said. This is too much.
I have not seen any Lysol in our house in years. In large measure because Lady Steed accused me of buying it to frequently so I stopped using it entirely to . . . makes some sort of point.
But I stopped opening out of respect for marital harmony and Lady Steed disappeared to somewhere (the garage) and returned with two more apparently full Lysol bottles.
So I sprayed down the bathroom.
And, you know what? Maybe I did used to buy too much Lysol.
Large S has had the mad vomits today and so I lamented that we didn't have any Lysol to, you know, kills germs the easy way with.
Lady Steed said we did so have Lysol.
Ha ha, I said, mocking her unwarranted certainty.
She told me where, but I didn't bother to look until I was passing by anyway. Sure enough, three new bottles bundled in plastic. So I meaculpaed and started to open them when Lady Steed told me to STOP! We have some already opened!
Ha ha, I said. This is too much.
I have not seen any Lysol in our house in years. In large measure because Lady Steed accused me of buying it to frequently so I stopped using it entirely to . . . makes some sort of point.
But I stopped opening out of respect for marital harmony and Lady Steed disappeared to somewhere (the garage) and returned with two more apparently full Lysol bottles.
So I sprayed down the bathroom.
And, you know what? Maybe I did used to buy too much Lysol.
2011-08-20
Thinking thoughts about thinking
.
Please, she said. Please. Then she cast her eyes past my shoulder and sighed that maddening smile that had been the reason her uncle had killed those cats. Please.
I shook my head, but I shook it with genuine sadness. It wasn't as if I enjoyed marking the fences with my own urine. And accumulating sufficient urine hadn't been a joy, either. And in these days of postrefridgeration, I knew it hadn't been a joy for her either. I thought of apologizing, but my pride had already taken too many beatings that month.
She turned around and watched the hairs on a rabbit skull blow in the wind. I know, she said. I knew, rather, I knew.
You didn't know anything, I snarled, then felt immediately embarrassed. Although most of our suffering had, yes, been her fault, I knew it wasn't fair to blame her --- or, rather, I knew I couldn't blame her more than she already blamed herself. But I stopped short of apologizing.
The sweat on the backs of her calves sparkled in the setting sun, and for the first time in weeks I took notice of her shape as a woman and of the ragged yellow remains of a sundress that hung from her tired, dirty, emaciated frame. And felt glad I could not see myself.
It has to be done.
I know.
I'm --- But I still could not apologize. But to what end? For what could I be blamed.
I know, she repeated.
So I continued sloshing out my urine and tried desperately not to look at her, not to remember, not to apologize, not to hope to dream to hold to repair. We could not go backwards. So I would not go backwards.
I just continued down the fenceline, trusting she would follow me. Or if not, hoping that we would forgive.
Please, she said. Please. Then she cast her eyes past my shoulder and sighed that maddening smile that had been the reason her uncle had killed those cats. Please.
I shook my head, but I shook it with genuine sadness. It wasn't as if I enjoyed marking the fences with my own urine. And accumulating sufficient urine hadn't been a joy, either. And in these days of postrefridgeration, I knew it hadn't been a joy for her either. I thought of apologizing, but my pride had already taken too many beatings that month.
She turned around and watched the hairs on a rabbit skull blow in the wind. I know, she said. I knew, rather, I knew.
You didn't know anything, I snarled, then felt immediately embarrassed. Although most of our suffering had, yes, been her fault, I knew it wasn't fair to blame her --- or, rather, I knew I couldn't blame her more than she already blamed herself. But I stopped short of apologizing.
The sweat on the backs of her calves sparkled in the setting sun, and for the first time in weeks I took notice of her shape as a woman and of the ragged yellow remains of a sundress that hung from her tired, dirty, emaciated frame. And felt glad I could not see myself.
It has to be done.
I know.
I'm --- But I still could not apologize. But to what end? For what could I be blamed.
I know, she repeated.
So I continued sloshing out my urine and tried desperately not to look at her, not to remember, not to apologize, not to hope to dream to hold to repair. We could not go backwards. So I would not go backwards.
I just continued down the fenceline, trusting she would follow me. Or if not, hoping that we would forgive.
2011-08-12
Philosophy & Baseball
.
058) Take Time for Paradise by A. Bartlett Giamatti, finished August 11
This is a book about baseball. Sort of. It's supposed to be about baseball. The subtitle, "Americans and Their Games", the cover image (Fenway Park), and the number of times the word "baseball" is used on the cover (nine on my ARC), one might expect a bit more baseball than is actually featured.
But here's a list of his other books, to give you a sense of who this author is:
Giamatti, before becoming commissioner of Major League Baseball, was Yale's youngest president and before that a professor of literature thereat. So that's the person writing this book.
The book is broken into three sections, which I'll talk about separately.
Self-Knowledge
Even though it's not really about baseball (at all), this is my favorite of the three sections. In essence, Giamatti argues that work should be defined as that which staves off death. Leisure, in contrast, is what we do to celebrate death staved off.
Leisure includes school (our English word comes from the Greek word for leisure, incidentally --- Giamatti can never resist a chance to poke in a bit of etymology) and sport, both. Leisure activities such as these exist in a space outside death / not death. It is our original Paradise. It is freedom of mind and body.
Art and sport and study are all activities we do outside our battle with death.
Compelling stuff and fun arguments.
Community
Here we get a similar set of arguments that suggest that cities are the great artifacts of human culture and what cities mean and how sports tie into citylife. Interesting, but I'm kind of ready to see how baseball is more compelling than other sports already.
Baseball as Narrative
In this sliver of a book, this is a sliver of a section.
I have often argued that sports --- let's be specific and say football --- is symbolic warfare, two armies battling it out on the field. But that story doesn't work so well with baseball. And Giamatti makes a compelling argument that the archetype baseball calls on is the Odyssey. Leaving home and, through dangers, attempting to return home.
And then he shows why this story applies especially well to Americans. This part got short shrift, imho, but I got the gist.
And then he tells a story about the 1987 NLCS which I suppose is illustrative of his arguments and that is certainly poetically written.
And then the little epilogue which is a nice little summary. The end.
Did I like the book? Yes. Would I recommend it? Yes. It's only 100 pages and well written and smart, which is nice. I like a bit of philosophy with my sports. But it wasn't quite what I was expecting and I think it's a little less baseball than promised. So expect that. Because it's not how they're selling it
a monthish
skip to comments
===========================================================
Previously in 2011 . . . . :
This is a book about baseball. Sort of. It's supposed to be about baseball. The subtitle, "Americans and Their Games", the cover image (Fenway Park), and the number of times the word "baseball" is used on the cover (nine on my ARC), one might expect a bit more baseball than is actually featured.
But here's a list of his other books, to give you a sense of who this author is:
- The Earthly Paradise and the Renaissance Epic Play of Double Senses: Spenser’s Faerie Queene The University and the Public Interest Exile and Change in Renaissance Literature
Giamatti, before becoming commissioner of Major League Baseball, was Yale's youngest president and before that a professor of literature thereat. So that's the person writing this book.
The book is broken into three sections, which I'll talk about separately.
Self-Knowledge
Even though it's not really about baseball (at all), this is my favorite of the three sections. In essence, Giamatti argues that work should be defined as that which staves off death. Leisure, in contrast, is what we do to celebrate death staved off.
Leisure includes school (our English word comes from the Greek word for leisure, incidentally --- Giamatti can never resist a chance to poke in a bit of etymology) and sport, both. Leisure activities such as these exist in a space outside death / not death. It is our original Paradise. It is freedom of mind and body.
Art and sport and study are all activities we do outside our battle with death.
Compelling stuff and fun arguments.
Community
Here we get a similar set of arguments that suggest that cities are the great artifacts of human culture and what cities mean and how sports tie into citylife. Interesting, but I'm kind of ready to see how baseball is more compelling than other sports already.
Baseball as Narrative
In this sliver of a book, this is a sliver of a section.
I have often argued that sports --- let's be specific and say football --- is symbolic warfare, two armies battling it out on the field. But that story doesn't work so well with baseball. And Giamatti makes a compelling argument that the archetype baseball calls on is the Odyssey. Leaving home and, through dangers, attempting to return home.
And then he shows why this story applies especially well to Americans. This part got short shrift, imho, but I got the gist.
And then he tells a story about the 1987 NLCS which I suppose is illustrative of his arguments and that is certainly poetically written.
And then the little epilogue which is a nice little summary. The end.
Did I like the book? Yes. Would I recommend it? Yes. It's only 100 pages and well written and smart, which is nice. I like a bit of philosophy with my sports. But it wasn't quite what I was expecting and I think it's a little less baseball than promised. So expect that. Because it's not how they're selling it
a monthish
skip to comments
===========================================================
Previously in 2011 . . . . :
53-57
057) The Shining by Stephen King, finished August 9
056) I Don't Want to Kill You by Dan Wells, finished August 6
055) Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs, finished August 2
054) Moneyball by Michael Lewis, finished July 12
053) Madman New Giant Size Super Ginchy Special by Mike Allred et al, finished approximately July 9
51-52
052) The Influencing Machine by Brooke Gladstone and Josh Neufeld, finished July 8
051) Wilson by Daniel Clowes, finished July 6
46-50
050) Timequake by Kurt Vonnegut, finished July 1
049) Housekeeping vs. The Dirt by Nick Hornby, finished June 25
048) The Light Princess by George Macdonald, finished June 22
047) Half a Life by Darin Strauss, finished June 17
046) Babymouse: Cupcake Tycoon by Jennifer L. Holm and Matt Holm (siblings), finished June 16
42-45
045) Ender in Exile by Orson Scott Card, finished June 10
044) Writings from The New Yorker 1927-1976 by E.B. White (edited by Rebecca M. Dale), finished June 7
043) The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin, finished May 31
042) Unnamed book by unnamed client (MS POLICY),
finished May 27
33-41
041) Scott Pilgrim's Finest Hour by Bryan Lee O'Malley, finished May 14
040) Scott Pilgrim Versus The Unverse by Bryan Lee O'Malley, finished May 14
039) Scott Pilgrim Gets It Together by Bryan Lee O'Malley, finished May 13
037) The Code of the Woosters by P.G. Wodehouse, finished May 11
036) Scott Pilgrim Versus The World by Bryan Lee O'Malley
035) Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Life by Bryan Lee O'Malley
034) The Complete Peanuts 1975-1976 by Charles M. Schulz, finished May 1
033) Asterios Polyp by David Mazzucchelli finished approximately April 27
32
032) Golden Gate by Seth Vikram, finished April 20
27-31
031) Batman: Year 100 by Paul Pope, finished April 18
030) The Polysyllabic Spree by Nick Hornby, finished April 9
029) iZombie: Dead to the World by Chris Roberson and Mike Allred, finished April 2
028) A Sense of Order and Other Stories by Jack Harrell, finished April 1
027) Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead by Tom Stoppard, finished March 30
26
026) The Black Dogs by Ian McEwan, finished March 21
23-25
025) Stitches by David Small, finished March 20
024) Arkham Asylum: Madness
023) Hamlet by William Shakespeare, finished March 18
21-22
022) Red Rocket 7 by Mike Allred, finished March 10
021) Missile Mouse: Rescue on Tankium3 by Jake Parker, finished March 10
20
020) The Hotel Cat by Esther Averill, finished February 28
18-19
019) Wonderland by Tommy Kovac and Sonny Liew, finished February 21
018) Redcoat by Kohl Glass (MS POLICY), finished February 18
14-17
017) Best American Comics 2010 edited by Neil Gaiman, finished February 12
016) Little Bee by Chris Cleave, finished February 10
015) Travels with Charley by John Steinbeck, finished February 2
014) Cursed Pirate Girl: The Collected Edition Vol. I by Jeremy Bastian, finished January 31
13-9
013) Sweet Tooth: In Captivity by Jeff Lemire, finished January 30
012) Sweet Tooth: Out of the Woods by Jeff Lemire, finished January 30
011) Essex County: The Country Nurse by Jeff Lemire, finished January 30
010) Essex County: Ghost Stories by Jeff Lemire, finished January 29
009) Essex County: Tales from the Farm by Jeff Lemire, finished January 29
8
008) Magdalene by Morah Jovan, finished January 27
7-6
007) Knightfall Part Two: Who Rules the Night by a slew of DC folk, finished January 23
006) Bayou by Jeremy Love, finished January 17
5-1
005) Mr. Monster by Dan Wells, finished January 10
004) The Red Badge of Courage by Stephen Crane, finished January 6
003) The Mystery of the Dinosaur Graveyard by Mary Adrian, finished January 5
002) Batman - Judge Dredd: Judgment on Gotham by John Wagner and Alan Grant and Simon Bisley, with lettering by the famous Todd Klein; finished January 4
001) Batman: Venom by Dennis O'Neil et al, finished January 2
2011-08-09
It just gets better and better
.
057) The Shining by Stephen King, finished August 9
This book has had a hard life. I bought it at a garage sale, an old paperback in wonderful shape. Then it was between the car's fronts seats and the baby crawled over it and ruined the cover and it's been downhill from there. It's an interesting cover though. Maybe sometime we can have a discussion just about the cover. I have theories about what the designer (uncredited) was thinking.
Anyway. I'm going to say some things about this book which are very out of character for me. And you know how I feel about the word very.
First, the mounting dread of the first portions of the book is stellar. And something I like best is how the terror is connected closely to the alcoholism. King, of course, is a man who knows about addiction and his description of Jack's relationship with the bottle, whether "autobiographical" or not, bleeds such honest blood that it's hard not to read this as King's own fears for himself.
And then the horror show starts.
And while the build up is excellent and I was often unsettled, in this case, the metaphorical horror couldn't quite compare with the literal fear of losing one's soul to the liquid.
Of course, I should have read this book alone and in the middle of the night. (One part I did, alone in the middle of the night in Yosemite with a stomach bug that wouldn't let me leave the vicinity of the toilet. I read by red headlamp. That was good for the book.) But mostly I read in snippets in the car as I waited for someone or on BART between stops etc. Not the most respectful way to read the book.
Anyway, having finally read the book, now I can see the movie. Although knowing that many of the most famous elements of the film aren't here, I'm feeling comfortable just resetting my expectations.
three or four months
056) I Don't Want to Kill You by Dan Wells, finished August 6
I loved this series. How much did I love this series? Enough that I read this series. The only other series I've read recently was The Hunger Games and that was as much out of a sense of obligation to the zeitgeist more than anything else. These books I loved. (Read about one and two.
The Hunger Games comparison is useful though. On the surface, they're quite similar. YA books with huge adult appeal, grossly violent, each book follows a similar pattern to the others, each has a troubled hero who must pass through great horror in order to succeed.
But Wells's books are better.
For instance. The third HG book, like the third John Cleaver book, followed a similar basic structure while raising the stakes tremendously. But the structure of HG3 felt a bit hokey and artificial. And when Something Terrible happened, it mostly seemed to happen to show how badass the author was. While I knew things from page one that the hero didn't notice in IDWtKY, his reasons for remaining unaware were believable and the Somethings Terrible were shocking and necessary to the story and built on each other in a way that was genuinely horrifying rather than just a weak attempt at miseryporn.
I'm unsure I want to get at all specific as I really think you should just read these books, but hey: you should really read these books. They are enormously propulsive and have excellent characters and brilliant fantastical elements and genuine horror, yes, but more importantly: terror.
Do yourself a favor.
Meet John Wayne Cleaver.
(In other news, he's left the books in a place where they could very easily become an ongoing series. I'm not a huge fan of ongoing series in general, but I might make an exception in this case, should Wells decide to write them. On the one hand, bread and butter. On the other hand, don't stop imagining new things. Back on the first hand, these books haven't prevented imagining new things yet.)
about twenty-four hours
===========================================================
055) Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs, finished August 2
I didn't notice until I was fifty or seventy pages into the book that this is published by Quirk Books, but once I noticed their logo on the spine, it became terribly obvious. It, like Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, takes something that already exists and turns it into something with quite modern intentions. In this case, the author took found photos, and built a story around them. The story is about a school found through a secret method wherein live children with strange and wonderful powers and a boy who thought he was normal who must lead them to victory against those whose lust for power destroyed their very souls.
The story is propulsive. I had a mostly good time reading it. It was fun and fast to read and had those great old photos as illustrations.
But as much as I think most people will enjoy it, I must warn fellow writers and other snobs that at times the story is utterly clunky. Consider this passage from page 209, which is typical:
I imagine that even reading that alone you are tearing your hair out. And this sort of thing happened ALL THE TIME. It's not that our narrator is TSTL. But he it often waaaaay TS all the same.
A few moments after I closed the final page I realized I had been set up. Even though the book is marketed as a standalone, it is clearly intended to be the opening salvo in a series. I don't know if Quirk has announced this yet (and don't care enough to visit their website), but it's pretty obvious. I don't intend to read the further volumes for a few reasons (I didn't like this one that much, I'm convinced that though the time travel element will be fun that it will break down under anything like close inspection, etc), but I expect there will be kids who will.
(One other thing, I'm not under the impression this is being marketed as a YA book though it seems an obvious thing to include under that title, but this has some Hunger Games-worthy violence, so keep that in mind.)
(Oh: One other thing. The book is beautifully made, and mad props to Quirk for putting the P&P&Z money to good use and building a brand. Respect, yo.)
under two weeks
===========================================================
054) Moneyball by Michael Lewis, finished July 12
Nick Hornby, who, being British, can't possibly know much about baseball, was absolutely right about this book. I read it in two days. I can't remember the last time I read a long book with no pictures in two days (and I'm too lazy to look just now. As a look at characters, it's terrific. As an introduction to sabermetrics, it's excellent. And, as per Hornby, it's a brilliant read even if you don't know baseball.
But WHY is it such a compelling read? What made me carry it with me everywhere and not stop reading? I'm not sure. But I think I need to find out. Maybe I need to stop reading ten books (20? 50?) at a time and read books one at a time and learn what makes something propelling. But do I have the moral fortitude?
Probably not.
In other news, this book made me think a lot about how to apply math to improving education. Because everyone from Bill Gates to Arne Duncan thinks we should do it. And maybe their right. But what do we measure? And how do we do it? And what would those numbers then mean? And how would we go about acting on them?
We. Don't. Know.
And frankly, I doubt we ever will. Unlike stocks and baseball, we don't have decades of data measured in the same or similar ways over decades and zillions of incidents with tons of observers. I don't know how we can reproduce that.
So many variables. The mind boggles.
Anyway. Fun book!
two days
===========================================================
053) Madman New Giant Size Super Ginchy Special by Mike Allred et al, finished approximately July 9
Mike really sleepwalked through this one. One lesser story from him, two better stories from other people, and a bunch of pinups, most of which (all of which?) have shown up in previous collection. Doesn't really give me faith for the big anniversary book that's coming out later this year . . . .
a sitting
===========================================================
Previously in 2011 . . . . :
This book has had a hard life. I bought it at a garage sale, an old paperback in wonderful shape. Then it was between the car's fronts seats and the baby crawled over it and ruined the cover and it's been downhill from there. It's an interesting cover though. Maybe sometime we can have a discussion just about the cover. I have theories about what the designer (uncredited) was thinking.
Anyway. I'm going to say some things about this book which are very out of character for me. And you know how I feel about the word very.
First, the mounting dread of the first portions of the book is stellar. And something I like best is how the terror is connected closely to the alcoholism. King, of course, is a man who knows about addiction and his description of Jack's relationship with the bottle, whether "autobiographical" or not, bleeds such honest blood that it's hard not to read this as King's own fears for himself.
And then the horror show starts.
And while the build up is excellent and I was often unsettled, in this case, the metaphorical horror couldn't quite compare with the literal fear of losing one's soul to the liquid.
Of course, I should have read this book alone and in the middle of the night. (One part I did, alone in the middle of the night in Yosemite with a stomach bug that wouldn't let me leave the vicinity of the toilet. I read by red headlamp. That was good for the book.) But mostly I read in snippets in the car as I waited for someone or on BART between stops etc. Not the most respectful way to read the book.
Anyway, having finally read the book, now I can see the movie. Although knowing that many of the most famous elements of the film aren't here, I'm feeling comfortable just resetting my expectations.
three or four months
056) I Don't Want to Kill You by Dan Wells, finished August 6
I loved this series. How much did I love this series? Enough that I read this series. The only other series I've read recently was The Hunger Games and that was as much out of a sense of obligation to the zeitgeist more than anything else. These books I loved. (Read about one and two.
The Hunger Games comparison is useful though. On the surface, they're quite similar. YA books with huge adult appeal, grossly violent, each book follows a similar pattern to the others, each has a troubled hero who must pass through great horror in order to succeed.
But Wells's books are better.
For instance. The third HG book, like the third John Cleaver book, followed a similar basic structure while raising the stakes tremendously. But the structure of HG3 felt a bit hokey and artificial. And when Something Terrible happened, it mostly seemed to happen to show how badass the author was. While I knew things from page one that the hero didn't notice in IDWtKY, his reasons for remaining unaware were believable and the Somethings Terrible were shocking and necessary to the story and built on each other in a way that was genuinely horrifying rather than just a weak attempt at miseryporn.
I'm unsure I want to get at all specific as I really think you should just read these books, but hey: you should really read these books. They are enormously propulsive and have excellent characters and brilliant fantastical elements and genuine horror, yes, but more importantly: terror.
Do yourself a favor.
Meet John Wayne Cleaver.
(In other news, he's left the books in a place where they could very easily become an ongoing series. I'm not a huge fan of ongoing series in general, but I might make an exception in this case, should Wells decide to write them. On the one hand, bread and butter. On the other hand, don't stop imagining new things. Back on the first hand, these books haven't prevented imagining new things yet.)
about twenty-four hours
===========================================================
055) Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs, finished August 2
The story is propulsive. I had a mostly good time reading it. It was fun and fast to read and had those great old photos as illustrations.
But as much as I think most people will enjoy it, I must warn fellow writers and other snobs that at times the story is utterly clunky. Consider this passage from page 209, which is typical:
I wandered into the yard, wondering how I was supposed to get the image of that withered apple out of my head. Before long, though I did [sic]. It's not that I forgot; it just stopped bothering me. It was the strangest thing.
I imagine that even reading that alone you are tearing your hair out. And this sort of thing happened ALL THE TIME. It's not that our narrator is TSTL. But he it often waaaaay TS all the same.
A few moments after I closed the final page I realized I had been set up. Even though the book is marketed as a standalone, it is clearly intended to be the opening salvo in a series. I don't know if Quirk has announced this yet (and don't care enough to visit their website), but it's pretty obvious. I don't intend to read the further volumes for a few reasons (I didn't like this one that much, I'm convinced that though the time travel element will be fun that it will break down under anything like close inspection, etc), but I expect there will be kids who will.
(One other thing, I'm not under the impression this is being marketed as a YA book though it seems an obvious thing to include under that title, but this has some Hunger Games-worthy violence, so keep that in mind.)
(Oh: One other thing. The book is beautifully made, and mad props to Quirk for putting the P&P&Z money to good use and building a brand. Respect, yo.)
under two weeks
===========================================================
054) Moneyball by Michael Lewis, finished July 12
Nick Hornby, who, being British, can't possibly know much about baseball, was absolutely right about this book. I read it in two days. I can't remember the last time I read a long book with no pictures in two days (and I'm too lazy to look just now. As a look at characters, it's terrific. As an introduction to sabermetrics, it's excellent. And, as per Hornby, it's a brilliant read even if you don't know baseball.
But WHY is it such a compelling read? What made me carry it with me everywhere and not stop reading? I'm not sure. But I think I need to find out. Maybe I need to stop reading ten books (20? 50?) at a time and read books one at a time and learn what makes something propelling. But do I have the moral fortitude?
Probably not.
In other news, this book made me think a lot about how to apply math to improving education. Because everyone from Bill Gates to Arne Duncan thinks we should do it. And maybe their right. But what do we measure? And how do we do it? And what would those numbers then mean? And how would we go about acting on them?
We. Don't. Know.
And frankly, I doubt we ever will. Unlike stocks and baseball, we don't have decades of data measured in the same or similar ways over decades and zillions of incidents with tons of observers. I don't know how we can reproduce that.
So many variables. The mind boggles.
Anyway. Fun book!
two days
===========================================================
053) Madman New Giant Size Super Ginchy Special by Mike Allred et al, finished approximately July 9
Mike really sleepwalked through this one. One lesser story from him, two better stories from other people, and a bunch of pinups, most of which (all of which?) have shown up in previous collection. Doesn't really give me faith for the big anniversary book that's coming out later this year . . . .
a sitting
===========================================================
Previously in 2011 . . . . :
51-52
052) The Influencing Machine by Brooke Gladstone and Josh Neufeld, finished July 8
051) Wilson by Daniel Clowes, finished July 6
46-50
050) Timequake by Kurt Vonnegut, finished July 1
049) Housekeeping vs. The Dirt by Nick Hornby, finished June 25
048) The Light Princess by George Macdonald, finished June 22
047) Half a Life by Darin Strauss, finished June 17
046) Babymouse: Cupcake Tycoon by Jennifer L. Holm and Matt Holm (siblings), finished June 16
42-45
045) Ender in Exile by Orson Scott Card, finished June 10
044) Writings from The New Yorker 1927-1976 by E.B. White (edited by Rebecca M. Dale), finished June 7
043) The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin, finished May 31
042) Unnamed book by unnamed client (MS POLICY),
finished May 27
33-41
041) Scott Pilgrim's Finest Hour by Bryan Lee O'Malley, finished May 14
040) Scott Pilgrim Versus The Unverse by Bryan Lee O'Malley, finished May 14
039) Scott Pilgrim Gets It Together by Bryan Lee O'Malley, finished May 13
037) The Code of the Woosters by P.G. Wodehouse, finished May 11
036) Scott Pilgrim Versus The World by Bryan Lee O'Malley
035) Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Life by Bryan Lee O'Malley
034) The Complete Peanuts 1975-1976 by Charles M. Schulz, finished May 1
033) Asterios Polyp by David Mazzucchelli finished approximately April 27
32
032) Golden Gate by Seth Vikram, finished April 20
27-31
031) Batman: Year 100 by Paul Pope, finished April 18
030) The Polysyllabic Spree by Nick Hornby, finished April 9
029) iZombie: Dead to the World by Chris Roberson and Mike Allred, finished April 2
028) A Sense of Order and Other Stories by Jack Harrell, finished April 1
027) Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead by Tom Stoppard, finished March 30
26
026) The Black Dogs by Ian McEwan, finished March 21
23-25
025) Stitches by David Small, finished March 20
024) Arkham Asylum: Madness
023) Hamlet by William Shakespeare, finished March 18
21-22
022) Red Rocket 7 by Mike Allred, finished March 10
021) Missile Mouse: Rescue on Tankium3 by Jake Parker, finished March 10
20
020) The Hotel Cat by Esther Averill, finished February 28
18-19
019) Wonderland by Tommy Kovac and Sonny Liew, finished February 21
018) Redcoat by Kohl Glass (MS POLICY), finished February 18
14-17
017) Best American Comics 2010 edited by Neil Gaiman, finished February 12
016) Little Bee by Chris Cleave, finished February 10
015) Travels with Charley by John Steinbeck, finished February 2
014) Cursed Pirate Girl: The Collected Edition Vol. I by Jeremy Bastian, finished January 31
13-9
013) Sweet Tooth: In Captivity by Jeff Lemire, finished January 30
012) Sweet Tooth: Out of the Woods by Jeff Lemire, finished January 30
011) Essex County: The Country Nurse by Jeff Lemire, finished January 30
010) Essex County: Ghost Stories by Jeff Lemire, finished January 29
009) Essex County: Tales from the Farm by Jeff Lemire, finished January 29
8
008) Magdalene by Morah Jovan, finished January 27
7-6
007) Knightfall Part Two: Who Rules the Night by a slew of DC folk, finished January 23
006) Bayou by Jeremy Love, finished January 17
5-1
005) Mr. Monster by Dan Wells, finished January 10
004) The Red Badge of Courage by Stephen Crane, finished January 6
003) The Mystery of the Dinosaur Graveyard by Mary Adrian, finished January 5
002) Batman - Judge Dredd: Judgment on Gotham by John Wagner and Alan Grant and Simon Bisley, with lettering by the famous Todd Klein; finished January 4
001) Batman: Venom by Dennis O'Neil et al, finished January 2
2011-08-06
Found: Quotes
.
On an old burnt cd (c. the founding of this blog), I found these gems:
"The Bay Guardian are conspiracy freaks who'd say bad things about us no matter what. If SF Weekly discovered the cure for cancer, the San Francisco Bay Guardian would bemoan our assault on the cherished liberal ideal of mortality."
----SF Weekly editor John Mecklin
"Art is that over which beings with perfect knowledge can still have divergent viewpoints."
----D. Michael Martindale
"These are biblical times. The turning of the second millennium has brought war, rumors of war and all sorts of new-Jehovian highjinks.'
----Joe Klein
"I don't think it's a question of morality. I think it's a question of politics."
----Richard Clark
"I have always believed in god, but never knew it was me until recently."
----Chris Roller (meaning he has discovered that he is god)
"There's a huge, almost unanimous view that this is a fundamental problem, to unite these two things. My belief is that it very well may be that God didn't intend that."
----physicist Freeman Dyson of the Institute for Advanced Study Ñ Princeton, N.J., on the theory of everything
"We've learned over the years that if we wanted we could write anything that just felt good or sounded good and it didn't necessarily have to have any particular meaning to us. As odd as it seemed to us, reviewers would take it upon themselves to interject their own meanings on our lyrics. Sometimes we sit and read other people's interpretations of our lyrics and think, 'Hey, that's pretty good.' If we liked it, we would keep our mouths shut and just accept the credit as if it was what we meant all along."
----John Lennon
On an old burnt cd (c. the founding of this blog), I found these gems:
"The Bay Guardian are conspiracy freaks who'd say bad things about us no matter what. If SF Weekly discovered the cure for cancer, the San Francisco Bay Guardian would bemoan our assault on the cherished liberal ideal of mortality."
----SF Weekly editor John Mecklin
"Art is that over which beings with perfect knowledge can still have divergent viewpoints."
----D. Michael Martindale
"These are biblical times. The turning of the second millennium has brought war, rumors of war and all sorts of new-Jehovian highjinks.'
----Joe Klein
"I don't think it's a question of morality. I think it's a question of politics."
----Richard Clark
"I have always believed in god, but never knew it was me until recently."
----Chris Roller (meaning he has discovered that he is god)
"There's a huge, almost unanimous view that this is a fundamental problem, to unite these two things. My belief is that it very well may be that God didn't intend that."
----physicist Freeman Dyson of the Institute for Advanced Study Ñ Princeton, N.J., on the theory of everything
"We've learned over the years that if we wanted we could write anything that just felt good or sounded good and it didn't necessarily have to have any particular meaning to us. As odd as it seemed to us, reviewers would take it upon themselves to interject their own meanings on our lyrics. Sometimes we sit and read other people's interpretations of our lyrics and think, 'Hey, that's pretty good.' If we liked it, we would keep our mouths shut and just accept the credit as if it was what we meant all along."
----John Lennon
2011-08-05
Chuckle with me now
.
Amusing errors I scraped from submitted announcements back when I worked at the Tehachapi News.
==================
TVRPD offers yoga, "Gentile to Traditional"
"Inmates enage in a variety of crafts including craving soap."
"But first, to get into the program, Mosher says Òan inmate must be discipline free and have a desire to do an acceptable craft.Ó"
"If you cannot attend [the funeral], your thoughts and payers will be much appreciated by the family."
"The Oak Tree MenÕs Golf Club of Bear Valley Springs hosed another successful member-guest tournament."
Amusing errors I scraped from submitted announcements back when I worked at the Tehachapi News.
==================
TVRPD offers yoga, "Gentile to Traditional"
"Inmates enage in a variety of crafts including craving soap."
"But first, to get into the program, Mosher says Òan inmate must be discipline free and have a desire to do an acceptable craft.Ó"
"If you cannot attend [the funeral], your thoughts and payers will be much appreciated by the family."
"The Oak Tree MenÕs Golf Club of Bear Valley Springs hosed another successful member-guest tournament."
2011-08-04
Bicycle poems
.
Just found this old text file of poems. Either it's really experimental or certain software standards have changed.
========================================================
ÐÏ à¡± á > þÿ % ' þÿÿÿ $ ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿì¥Á 3 ð ¿ ® jbjb ^ ^ h< h< ® ÿÿ ÿÿ ÿÿ l Ô Ô Ô Ô Ô Ô Ô , , , , , 8 , ê X X X X X X X X Ô Ö Ö Ö Ö Ö Ö , ! F Ô X X X X X ¨ Ô Ô X X X ¨ ¨ ¨ X " Ô X Ô X Ô ¨ è "
" Ô Ô Ô Ô X Ô ¨ , ¨ Ô Ô Ô Ô L ¦èã½ , , z . Ô Ô Ô g ¨ g Ô ¨ à å Morning
by Eric W. Jepson
The chain catches with its miniature
industrial clash as her thigh
makes the first inroads against
Newton’s law; the wind
rises from the early still, moving
aside her curtain of hair and revealing
a new, agile world to her renewing eyes.
Bbbbb
by Eric W. Jepson
Ran over
an aluminum can
And became a motorcycle
Potency
by Eric W. Jepson
Recent research suggests that all that
pressure on the perineum caused by
riding on your typical bicycle seat may
lead to, ah, impotence.
(Ah, impotence!)
Now, ah, “potence” is really only good
for one thing.
I need not mention it.
Now, the man whose perineum is so, ah, impacted
by his bicycle seat must, I need not mention,
have a more time-heavy relationship with his
bicycle than, ah, the partner of his potency.
Thus: why should this be cause for worry….
(Worry.)
The man nodded,
tugged at his latex shorts,
shook the doctor’s hand,
and stood to leave.
$ Y b s ® ýøò øò ø >* OJ QJ OJ QJ >* B ` € — º â % & / ? @ X a b t u Á é ý ý ý û û û û û û û û û ö ö ö û û û û û ö ö ö û û û û û $ a$ B ` € — º â % & / ? @ X ` a b c e s t u Á é ; J a b ’ À í G H Q R c ™ ® ýýý ûûûûûûû 5 ; J a b ’ À í G H Q R c ™ ® ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý °Ð/ °à=!° "° # $ %°
i 4 @ñÿ 4 N o r m a l CJ OJ PJ QJ mH < A@òÿ¡ < D e f a u l t P a r a g r a p h F o n t 0 >@ ò 0 T i t l e $ a$ >* OJ QJ ® ÿÿÿÿ ÿÿ z™ ÿÿ z™ ÿÿ z™ Y ® ® ®
® m s ° b d ° ÿÿ S y s t e m s 4 T N I 0 2 : T e m p o r a r y I t e m s : A u t o R e c o v e r y s a v e o f D o c u m e n t 1 S y s t e m s " T N I 0 2 : D e s k t o p F o l d e r : b i c y c l e p o e m s S y s t e m s " T N I 0 2 : D e s k t o p F o l d e r : b i c y c l e p o e m s ÿ@ € s s @§Y s s
® @ @ G T i m e s N e w R o m a n 5 € S y m b o l 3 A r i a l 3 T i m e s q Œ ðÐ h çkŒ&/lŒ& B , þ ! ð ¥ À ´ ´ € >0 d 7 ò ð ÿÿ M o r n i n g S y s t e m s þÿ
à…ŸòùOh «‘ +'³Ù0 P ˆ ¬ ¸ Ä Ô ä ð
$ 0 8 @ H ' Morning orn orn orn Normal Systems 2 st Microsoft Word 9.0 d@ X8 @ B®ëláÄ @ ÚŒkváÄ , þ þÿ
ÕÍÕœ. “— +,ù®0 ð h p | „ Œ ” œ ¤ ¬ ´
¼ Ð ' TNI 7 Ï Morning Title
þÿÿÿ
þÿÿÿ þÿÿÿ ! " # þÿÿÿýÿÿÿ& þÿÿÿþÿÿÿþÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿR o o t E n t r y ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ À F —q3áÄ ( € 1 T a b l e ÿÿÿÿ ÿÿÿÿ W o r d D o c u m e n t ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ S u m m a r y I n f o r m a t i o n ( ÿÿÿÿ D o c u m e n t S u m m a r y I n f o r m a t i o n 8 ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ C o m p O b j ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ X ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ þÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ þÿ ÿÿÿÿ À F Microsoft Word Document þÿÿÿNB6W Word.Document.8
Just found this old text file of poems. Either it's really experimental or certain software standards have changed.
========================================================
ÐÏ à¡± á > þÿ % ' þÿÿÿ $ ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿì¥Á 3 ð ¿ ® jbjb ^ ^ h< h< ® ÿÿ ÿÿ ÿÿ l Ô Ô Ô Ô Ô Ô Ô , , , , , 8 , ê X X X X X X X X Ô Ö Ö Ö Ö Ö Ö , ! F Ô X X X X X ¨ Ô Ô X X X ¨ ¨ ¨ X " Ô X Ô X Ô ¨ è "
" Ô Ô Ô Ô X Ô ¨ , ¨ Ô Ô Ô Ô L ¦èã½ , , z . Ô Ô Ô g ¨ g Ô ¨ à å Morning
by Eric W. Jepson
The chain catches with its miniature
industrial clash as her thigh
makes the first inroads against
Newton’s law; the wind
rises from the early still, moving
aside her curtain of hair and revealing
a new, agile world to her renewing eyes.
Bbbbb
by Eric W. Jepson
Ran over
an aluminum can
And became a motorcycle
Potency
by Eric W. Jepson
Recent research suggests that all that
pressure on the perineum caused by
riding on your typical bicycle seat may
lead to, ah, impotence.
(Ah, impotence!)
Now, ah, “potence” is really only good
for one thing.
I need not mention it.
Now, the man whose perineum is so, ah, impacted
by his bicycle seat must, I need not mention,
have a more time-heavy relationship with his
bicycle than, ah, the partner of his potency.
Thus: why should this be cause for worry….
(Worry.)
The man nodded,
tugged at his latex shorts,
shook the doctor’s hand,
and stood to leave.
$ Y b s ® ýøò øò ø >* OJ QJ OJ QJ >* B ` € — º â % & / ? @ X a b t u Á é ý ý ý û û û û û û û û û ö ö ö û û û û û ö ö ö û û û û û $ a$ B ` € — º â % & / ? @ X ` a b c e s t u Á é ; J a b ’ À í G H Q R c ™ ® ýýý ûûûûûûû 5 ; J a b ’ À í G H Q R c ™ ® ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý ý °Ð/ °à=!° "° # $ %°
i 4 @ñÿ 4 N o r m a l CJ OJ PJ QJ mH < A@òÿ¡ < D e f a u l t P a r a g r a p h F o n t 0 >@ ò 0 T i t l e $ a$ >* OJ QJ ® ÿÿÿÿ ÿÿ z™ ÿÿ z™ ÿÿ z™ Y ® ® ®
® m s ° b d ° ÿÿ S y s t e m s 4 T N I 0 2 : T e m p o r a r y I t e m s : A u t o R e c o v e r y s a v e o f D o c u m e n t 1 S y s t e m s " T N I 0 2 : D e s k t o p F o l d e r : b i c y c l e p o e m s S y s t e m s " T N I 0 2 : D e s k t o p F o l d e r : b i c y c l e p o e m s ÿ@ € s s @§Y s s
® @ @ G T i m e s N e w R o m a n 5 € S y m b o l 3 A r i a l 3 T i m e s q Œ ðÐ h çkŒ&/lŒ& B , þ ! ð ¥ À ´ ´ € >0 d 7 ò ð ÿÿ M o r n i n g S y s t e m s þÿ
à…ŸòùOh «‘ +'³Ù0 P ˆ ¬ ¸ Ä Ô ä ð
$ 0 8 @ H ' Morning orn orn orn Normal Systems 2 st Microsoft Word 9.0 d@ X8 @ B®ëláÄ @ ÚŒkváÄ , þ þÿ
ÕÍÕœ. “— +,ù®0 ð h p | „ Œ ” œ ¤ ¬ ´
¼ Ð ' TNI 7 Ï Morning Title
þÿÿÿ
þÿÿÿ þÿÿÿ ! " # þÿÿÿýÿÿÿ& þÿÿÿþÿÿÿþÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿR o o t E n t r y ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ À F —q3áÄ ( € 1 T a b l e ÿÿÿÿ ÿÿÿÿ W o r d D o c u m e n t ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ S u m m a r y I n f o r m a t i o n ( ÿÿÿÿ D o c u m e n t S u m m a r y I n f o r m a t i o n 8 ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ C o m p O b j ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ X ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ þÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ þÿ ÿÿÿÿ À F Microsoft Word Document þÿÿÿNB6W Word.Document.8
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)