Tuesday is the day you find things

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When I was in elementary school--sixth grade--I had a string of good luck wherein I received or found--at no cost to me--a bunch of cool stuff, always on Tuesdays. Thus, Tuesday became the day I found things.

In part, this designation was one symptom of my desperate attempts to be superstitious. Other failures included....

I tried to have a lucky clothespin. I kept forgetting to rely on it.

My three-taps,-three-swings routine simply didn't help me hit the baseball.

And all the traditional ones--black cats, ladders, salt over shoulders--simply did nothing for me. Too silly. And illogical.

I don't know what the big deal is. Tom Sawyer never had any trouble whatsoever being superstitious. It's not fair!

Anyway, I'm thinking I need to make another effort at being superstitious. I'ld like to start by finding cool stuff on Tuesdays, but here are some other notions I may try:

♦ Eat potato chips Friday nights in order to grow my investments.

♦ Shoot rubberbands at toddlers to stave off dementia.

♦ Scratch the backs of my thighs to ward off the evil eye.

♦ Stick my hands in my pockets whenever I see a shady character. And whistle.

♦ Same thing if I see a cop.

♦ Take my hat off indoors--I already do this anyway, but now I'm going to be motivated by a fear of vengeful earthquakes.

♦ Stick my fingers in my ears whenever I see an ad for luxury automobiles.

♦ Yawn every Monday morning at 2am.

If you have any superstitious suggestions for me, please don't hesitate to send them my way.