.This post is intended to last the casual reader a long time, it being a post of many parts, which parts may be read separately and commented upon without reading the entire post. Because of its length, it is preceded by this table of contents, enabling you to easily pick up where you left off:
Table of Contents
Apologium
Explanatorium
Svithe: My sense of entitlement
The ultimate copout:
On dancing, stretching, and taking it in the nose like a man
Frightening my students
Guess I'll go eat worms
Bigbrothermobile
That box
Redeeming Sting
Interesting
Cc
Monday, Monday
Yawning
Only the lonely
INTERMISSION
A great mystery
Tutorial
Worthiness
No bad language zone
Better versions?
Amira post
Right now: 8000
jonhedermovie VS jonhedermovie
Singalong Sophomores
Closing Comments
Apologium
There was some confusion with my last post, people thinking I was announcing a return to onlineness. Such is not the case. In fact, I am likely still weeks away from having internet at home. I am deeply sorry for the ensuing heartache and confusion.
Explanatorium
This lengthy post is intended to last a long long long time (see title). It is created in the spirit of my one-hundredth post, in which I posted all my unfinished posts. Below will follow all my unfinished posts since that time (with commentary) which may be perused at your leisure.
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First, as an apology to Master Fob who was disappointed by my lack of a svithe last Sunday, this jem:
Svithe: My sense of entitlement
April 23, 2006
.
taped glasses, ripped and repaired shite shirt, rundown trailer
expecting wealth and comfort
The world owes me a living
Laziness and unwillingness to work
Link to http://singingcicada.blogspot.com/2006/04/new-generation-of-thieves.html (though only jerky and cookies and floss.....)
-------------
added to my discomfort with being put in positions where I am expected to be the example
Commentary:
This would have been awesome. There's a great post in there somewhere. But I didn't get it prepped enough to finish on the road and ended up posting this svithe instead.
Speaking of copout posts...:
The ultimate copout:
July 5, 2006
.
Commentary:
Or how about this one?
On dancing, stretching, and taking it in the nose like a man
April 7, 2006
.
If
Commentary:
Nice, huh?
Frightening my students
September 26, 2005
.
In order to teach literary ideas, I have tried incorporating some songs this past week. Songs by King Missile, Beautiful South, Marcy Playground, and Ryan Shupe & the Rubberband. Songs with a high potential to offend and thus, I hope, grab students' attention. Songs that include some of the following lyrics:
Love is beautiful
Like the sunshine
And the dancing wind
Love is not ugly
Like puss
And lice
And tobacco snot
Love is beautiful
The perfect kiss is dry as sand and doesn't take your breath
The perfect kiss is with the boy that you've just stabbed to death
And all the whores on Blecker Street
They wear the blissful grin
Caused by the drugs they take
To relieve them of their sins
the best looking girls I see are driving in the fast lane
because I don’t find out that they’re obsessive, psychotic insane
the best looking girls I see,
oh my yes
because I don’t have to deal
with their PMS
(I hope I don't get fired.)
Commentary:
(Maybe this is why things worked out as they did....)
Guess I'll go eat worms
March 7, 2006
.
The equation of life is peculiar. Right now, my family is happy and comfortable and we love each other. This is most important. Second most important in my personal hierarchy is my writing career. I sold a story last month (read it here) and I have a book that might finally be plodding its way to publication. (Rule #44: NEver hold your breath.) The only things that are bad are these:
Our apartment's not as nice as we thought.
My job is hell. Not the kids per se, just the whole package.
Commentary:
Another high point as a high school teacher. I think I never finished fleshing this one out because one of my colleagues learned of my blog and I wasn't so sure I wanted him finding sentiments like this.
Bigbrothermobile
November 28, 2005
.
Because of Cicada's fascinating post on the subject, I am finally going to get around to commenting on the information blogpatrol has been feeding me on you, my precious readers.
First up, I think I changed the name of my blog just in time--someone came here looking for naked women from tehachapi and I don't want people thinking I run that kind of show.
Next, it seems that more people are, today, reading the Fobcave than Cicada Song because many, many more people have followed Master Fob's link than Cicada's.
Commentary:
I can blame my never finishing this post on Blogpatrol's lousy health since November 2005. It's nice to know not everything's my fault....
That box
December 28, 2005
.
Here's one more thing I don't like about tv: sometimes it is actually good.
Perhaps if tv was uniformly abysmal, I wouldn't mind having it in the house--after all, why would anyone turn on something that was guaranteed to be bad? But I think it is the recognized chance that with one more click Adult Swim might come on that makes television so dangerous.
Someone here at the residence of the Brass Clan received Firefly for Christmas and we have watched several of the episodes. (For those who, like me before Sunday, are not in the know, Firefly came to Fox three years ago where it was neglected and died. Once dead, a fan cult built up around it leading to that Serenity movie that came out a couple months ago.)
Commentary:
I let this one sit too long and every other blogger in creation took my delay as permission to write their own post on Firefly which made my post nothing more than a redundancy. So I abandoned it. Alas.
Let's do a couple on music now:
Redeeming Sting
March 16, 2006
.
jrhigh only bands knew
singles album lame
don't like
harmonicist's album
nice work if you can get it
etc
CHANGEDATE
Commentary:
Cryptic, isn't it! I honestly don't remember why I decided to redeem Sting on Thmusings (unless it was his pleading, but I'm not usually swayed by such pathetic displays). Maybe I just wanted to write about Sting's rendition of the Gershwins' "Nice Work if You Can Get It," which I love. Don't know.
Interesting
May 8, 2006
.
I'm playing Radiohead's OK Computer in my car right now and although I find Thom Yorke's voice kind of annoying, I like the album a lot. It's interesting.
Before OK Computer, I had a Shane Jackman album in
Commentary:
Our Utah trip had, among other benefits, the happy result of us buying cds, among which are the two mentioned in this post. The gist of the post was that I like my music interesting. Since writing this post, I've gotten over Mr Yorke's voice and have become a much more avid Radiohead fan. Anyone got the solo album?
For those with good memories, that Utah trip ended with a bang, and I started this post to talk about it:
Cc
February 6, 2006
.
Perhaps you have heard or perhaps you have not, but I led my dear family into danger this afternoon in an aborted attempt to flee the City of Sin.
Perhaps my being damned to this place is a result of my writing two cop-out svithes in a row. Perhaps it is a punishment for skipping church today. Perhaps it i
Commentary:
Ended midword! Oh my!
Monday, Monday
February 6, 2006
.
Without meaning to, I have discovered (or rediscovered) a certain, ah, prolixity of mine.
No, let me start over.
I am prolix. Or tend in that direction. Or something.
I have been making a real effort to speak more simply to my students lately. Not because I think it's good for them (though it likely is) and not because I don't like being told I'm the smartest teacher (because I really don't mind) but because for all my trying to place the right word in the right place, I may not thus be a better communicator.
Commentary:
Being the teacher with the largest vocabulary was all well and good, but sometime I just wanted my students to understand what the heck I was saying.
It could be a challenge.
Yawning
April 12, 2006
.
Hi, I--oh, excuse me (yawn....) I--
Commentary:
I later worked this out better here, in a post I am particularly proud of. (I may pick funny things to be proud of.) On the same day, I also attempted the next one.
Only the lonely
April 12, 2006
.
I've been thinking about my once-single self a bit lately. Not a lot, but enough to justify a post, so long as I have an amusing picture to accompany it.
Commentary:
I start posting on singledom, then I think better of it. This happens with some regularity.
>--------------------INTERMISSION--------------------<
Those of you who simply could not stop reading, may want to consider stopping here and leaving the rest for another day. Remember, updates to Thmusings will be irregular in the coming weeks.
>--------------------ENDERMISSION--------------------<
A great mystery
January 26, 2006
.
If this post shows up (I'm emailing it to Blogger), then hello. I haven't been able to leave comments all day and now I can't even see my blog--or anyone else's--or
blogger.com. I haven't received any comments since this morning either which may mean this is true for everyone.
If so, nevermind that hello....
And I'll leave that Silver Spoon comment for Cicada some other time....
Commentary:Since Blogger was screwing up, I tried emailing a post, but emailed posts only end up as drafts, not actual posts, which raises the question: What's the point?
Tutorial
March 16, 2006
.
CAHGNEDATE
explain cutelink method with screenshots
Commentary:
I assume I forgot about this when I wrote this post instead, four days later. I obviously need a secretary. Any takers?
Worthiness
May 20, 2006
.
My blog is worth like a billion dollars or something. Beat that.
My blog is worth like a billion dollars or something.
Ha ha ha! I forgot all about these! I should still do something with them!
No bad language zone
June 13, 2006
.
(xx)x
Commentary:
Ha ha! I like this one too! But since I never posted it, I have to assume that it was not originally intended to be one of my miniposts but something more in depth and this was merely placeholder to remind me to write the post. Alas that I know not what that post was.
Better versions?
June 30, 2006
.
Commentary:
After writing my post on Jane Austen, I decided to improve her portrait and uploaded the pictures to this pseudopost. But before I could switch to a better picture, Master Fob had commented and my personal rule is no revision once the first comment has been made. Too bad. But at least now you can see what might have been.
By the way, the Uncyclopedia article linked to was even worse before I did a spot of revison. It's still not that great though. One of you true fans should make it actually funny.
Amira post
June 7, 2006
.
http://foxyj.blogspot.com/2006/04/reviews.html
http://www.asiamex.com/proddetail.cfm?CFID=447999&CFTOKEN=683248&ItemID=490&CategoryID=28&SubCatID=47
http://grocerythai.com/catalog/images/83015.jpg
http://grocerythai.com/catalog/product_info.php/products_id/315
Held onto for about six weeks?
Ate today, June 7, 2006.
In my pocket that whole time.
Never did share with my beloved wife....
Don't usually like hard candy.
"tamarind"
Oh wow. It is so good....
Looks like a condom?!?! http://www.crfg.org/pubs/ff/tamarind.html
Wow. It is NOT pleasant looing.... http://www.suanwang.com/Tamarind/tamarind.html
Commentary:
Again, to Utah. We went to lunch with Master Fob, Foxy J and S-Boogie at Thai Chili Gardens. Where the bills were paid was a recepticle of hard candy, Amiras. And they were freaking delicious. My word were they good. Tamarind flavored. And truly delicious. I carried my last piece with me for weeks so I could write a live post as I ate it, but I only sort of accomplished that.
And it's the tamarind fruit, not the candy with the unpleasant appearance, by the way.
Right now: 8000
July 1, 2006
.
Check it out.
I'm catching up.
Crap. Already past.
Commentary:
He who snoozes, loses.
Besides, SiteMeter is a ways behind my true numbers.
Plus, I got kinda alotta grief for a similar post I had written shortly before. So screw you guys.
jonhedermovie VS jonhedermovie
July 12, 2006
.
Benchwarmers v ND
not too disparaging to people whoe film literacy is such that they lump the two together except to call them idiots
respect for characters
Commentary:
You'll note I started this one our last day online. We had seen Benchwarmers at the dollar theater the night before and I was steaming with anger at the existance of such a terrible movie.
The post was to be about my hatred toward anyone who would lump crap like The Benchwarmers with a great film like Napoleon Dynamite by calling them both "stupid movies" or some similar appellation, and to explain just what it was that made Nappy D so great--namely its love for the characters.
I will never watch Benchwarmers again so I will never be angry enough again to write this post.
But the most frightening thing is that as time goes on, I am remebering parts of it and thinking, "Hey Funny!" This worries me.
Singalong Sophomores
June 10, 2006
.
“To Zion”
Lauryn Hill featuring Carlos Santana
Folsom Prison Blues
Johnny Cash
Què Onda Guero
Beck
Eleanor Rigby
The Beatles
Karma Police
Radiohead
Mungo City
Spacehog
Sleep to Dream
Fiona Apple
Hyper-Ballad
björk
Ana Ng
They Might Be Giants
April Come She Will
Simon & Garfunkel
King Missile - The Dishwasher
Trigger Happy Jack
Poe
Movin' Out (Anthony's Song)
Billy Joel
PJ Harvey - Down By The Water
100 Million Little Bombs
Buddy Miller
“We Don't Stop”
Michael Franti and Spearhead featuring The Gift of Gab
Everything For Free
K's Choice
America
Bree Sharp
Traveling Song lyrics
Moonpools & Caterpillars
Mr Zebra
Tori Amos
U2 - Numb
Jude You Mama You
Commentary
I decided a long, long time ago to incorporate popular music in to my first year of English classes (why not, right?) and some mention of that has come before, but the big thrust was a packet of lyrics and questions I compiled of the music listed in this unfinished post. I intended to tell you all about my students' strage and unpredicable tastes (hatehatehate the Moonps, dig Billy Joel) and the many things I learned of from and about them as a result of this unit.
I never did get around to it.
Also long, long ago, I asked Master Fob to put together a list of classroom-worthy lyrics from that hiphop-slash-rap stuff he listens to, which he did with rapidity and thoroughness, and which I took months and months and months to finally use. Bonus points to those who can determine which two tracks came from him. It should be obvious.
Closing Comments:
Oh how I miss you! How I wish I had more than offal to offer! Too bad!
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.
People ought to read their friends' books. I'm feeling guilty.
I must first admit I hatehatehate those stupid emails about children's prayers and miracles. They're manipulatively told and almost certainly false. I hate all such tripe and the market is chocked with it. That's why this book, half of which I've read, was such a surprise. The book is full of miracles Harold B. Lee discreetly documented without ever intending to publish. They were stories quietly told to him by people who trusted him with their sacred experiences. It's a beautiful book that helps remind me what faith is beyond the world of email forwards and other mainstream religious garbage. This world is part of a beautiful creation founded in love and this collection is a powerful reminder of that fact.
I'm confused by people who claim not to love Sarah Vowell. Why would they lie about something like that?
I think that about covers it....
His name is Ted. Scott Adams would make a joke about that. I think I'll just read his book.
Billy Collins saved poetry for me. In return for this huge favor, I should buy his new book. But I haven't yet. See, that's where you come in.
Emily has inspired some of my own finer poetic offerings
Lynch is an undertaker in Michigan and I love his prose on his work. My limited experience with his poetry has also been positive. Vote Lynch! Our next Poet Laureate!
Speaking of the dead, I'm pretty disappointed that none of my so-called friends in Utah told me that Leslie Norris died. I had to learn about it from the BYU Humanities newsletter. Thanks a lot, guys.
Admit it: This looks crazy cool.
I like my melancholy with anthropomorphic dogs, thank you very much.
Unless, of course, that melancholy comes courtesy of the inestimable Edward Gorey, one of the true comic greats of the last century. Do you have the shivers? I have the shivers. Everyone has the shivers. Brrrrrr.
I tried and tried to find all the volumes in a row at the library, but that's nearly impossible. Now that they're all together in one book, perhaps I will finally find happiness....
Go ahead: scare me.
I feel I need to defend this choice to two camps: those who think the image of superhero comics is dragging the artform down, and those who complain that this offcenter title is the only superhero one here. To both camps I say this: Camping sucks. You smell. / / / Also, When I was a frequent visitor to the library Fob, I learned that the depths and complexities of superhero universes allow for amazing, literary feats unmatched anywhere else. Superhero comics are a viable literary form. But I haven't that much need to build a library like Master Fob's. This is all I really need right now. Thank you.
Is this album totally awesome? Yeah. Does the lead-singer chick totally have a bizarro hairdo? Yeah. Would it totally make my Coast Guard Day if you dropped it by with ice cream? Yeah.
Static & Silence is not my favorite album, nor is it the greatest album ever recorded, but it is the most beautiful album in humanity's history. And surely you wouldn't disallow a fellow a little more beauty in his life?
Name? Check. Daddy? Check. Wealth? Check. Album? What the-- I don't have it!
As if this set wasn't awesome enough already, you can get it and a tshirt for $35. I think I want the one with Lincoln on it, but feel free to surprise me.
I've never heard any of the music on this album. I have only the foggiest idea what the band sounds like. But I love the band's name, I love the way they dress, and I love the titles of their songs. What more do I need to know?
Box sets are all the rage.
Bill Plympton's Mutant Aliens. Let me say that again: Bill Plympton's Mutant Aliens.
The only reason not to own this is if your wife has a crush on Spike. But even then it's tempting.
There are three of these collections out so far. I have none of them. Sort of makes you question the purpose of life, doesn't it?
Ladies and gentlemen, presenting Space Ghost.
C'mon people, say it with me: Nee. Mah. Toads. You know you want some too.
