So I will die of lung cancer.

I will, I'm sure of it.

I've just learned that I have spent virtually all my life in or next to a series of Poison Centrals.

Go here and see if you can beat my scores:

For "Metropolitan Areas Most Polluted by Short-term Particle Pollution," I have lived or spent extensive time in numbers 1, 2, 3, 6, 15, and 23.

For "Metropolitan Areas Most Polluted by Year-Round Particle Pollution," I have lived or spent extensive time in numbers 1, 2, and 5.

For the "Counties Most Polluted by Long-Term Particle Pollution," I have lived or worked in 3, 4, and 7.

Of the "Most Ozone-Polluted Cities," I have lived or spent lots and lots of time in 1, 2, and 3.

Of the "Counties with the Worst Ozone Air Pollution," I am or have been on intimate terms or have frequently visited 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 10, 13(a), and 22.

Yep. I'm pretty much a goner.


  1. Woo hoo! I'm going to live forever! (Which isn't news since I knew I was going to live forever anyway because of the number of Twinkies I consume.)

    Short-term particle pollution: 6, 15, 25.

    Year-round particle pollution: 12.

    Long-term particle pollution counties: 15.

    Ozone-polluted cities: 9.

    Ozone-polluted counties: --.

  2. Yay. I'm gonna live! Of course, there is the other possibility that I will be murdered by my crazy neighbor that hates me because I trimmed my out-of-control holly bushes, or that I will be done in at a four-way stop by those lunatics in my pollution-free county that refuse to obey traffic laws and want to be "courteous," trying to get everyone else to go first, and then everyone piles into the intersection and dies.

    I don't want to diiiiiieeeeeee!

  3. Wow, I'm stunned that my state isn't on that list at all. I guess I'll die of another type of cancer from my microwave or cell phone or sweet n'low...

    (is it my imagination or are the word verifications getting longer and harder to type?)

  4. Wow. I'm from California. But my home town got an A and all zeroes on every air pollution statistic they have. Gotta love good old Napa CA, 94558. Not to brag, or anything. It's just that I'd heard that and I'm glad the website confirms.

  5. .

    Well, I hope you all come to my funeral.

  6. If you don't make the effort to meet me in real life, I won't make the effort to come to your funeral.

    Just so you know. It's all up to you.

  7. .

    You know, it's not that I don't want to--I'm just afraid I haven't the time.....